So much depends on what countries are involved. Go online to the nearest big city and look for lawyers specializing in international divorce.
PM me if you like, I can share what (little) I know if it's relevant to where you're located... hard to know from your post.
It all sucks, but you can come up with some good questions to ask, and get several free consultations. I actually paid a pretty dime for a consultation with someone but he/they knew a hell of a lot so it was worth it just in terms of my sanity. Same issue, anxiety over custody issue.
You're in exactly the spot I dread reaching - two years wasted with false R. What a jerk!