BS(me) 46, Two wonderful teens.
If you are trying to talk to him and he's refusing to agree on anything, then I would write up what you think is fair, go to a lawyer and have it written up. Then have him served. He can either agree, ignore, or fight you.
If he picks agree or ignore, you will get the D on the terms you want. If he chooses to fight, then you will go to a mediator or judge and see where it falls.
I would just stop giving him a choice to argue. Here's the papers. Sign, or tell me what you think is fair and get it going.
He is no longer my best friend. Repeat until it sticks.
WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.