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Newest Member: Starrystarrynight

Just Found Out :
Aren't you glad?

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 Gotmegood (original poster member #41407) posted at 2:44 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

In the first hours of screaming, crying and reeling from the revelation that my 64 year old H chose, drove 2 1/2 hours to meet,and paid to have sex w/ a 20 year old prostitute, he said to me "aren't you glad that it wasn't a REAL affair in which I loved or had emotional attachment"?

Me: faithful wife 62.
Him: WH 64 , prostitute 20 yr old
DDay: 8-13-2013
Status: boinging up and down like a yo-yo

posts: 764   ·   registered: Nov. 20th, 2013   ·   location: Florida
id 6569754
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devasted30 ( member #39439) posted at 3:24 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

OMG - they are just so friggin STUPID!!!!!

(((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))

And remember Murphy is right. Nothing is so bad that it can't get worse!!!

posts: 1944   ·   registered: Jun. 4th, 2013   ·   location: Ontario, Canada
id 6569803
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shiloe ( member #1224) posted at 3:28 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

Oh yes Gotmegood, you should be so happy

But remember, good love is hard to find . . -Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
BS - 58 Dday 03/2011
Cheater -58 Married 26 yrs
DD - 23 DD -21 DS-19
A#1 2000 with married ho-worker/neighbor ow#1
A#2 2007-? OW#2 LTA- new MCOW D-2/17

posts: 1729   ·   registered: Mar. 7th, 2003
id 6569808
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LMomof2 ( member #41064) posted at 3:41 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

(((HUGS))) from me, too.

LMomof2
Me - BW - 59
Him - WH - 59
35 yrs - 2 daughters 17, 21
DDay - 10-15-13
ONS - 9-20-13 and probably YEARS of gaslighting - signs were there.

posts: 81   ·   registered: Oct. 21st, 2013   ·   location: Pennsylvania
id 6569833
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LMomof2 ( member #41064) posted at 3:44 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

and I would like to tell your WH...Sorry, Buddy, you are still 64 years old. Screwing a 20 year old slut does not make you young again. Over the past year or so, my WH kept telling me how old he was getting, white hair, aches and pains..blah, blah, blah. Guess he was hoping his slut was the fountain of youth for him.

LMomof2
Me - BW - 59
Him - WH - 59
35 yrs - 2 daughters 17, 21
DDay - 10-15-13
ONS - 9-20-13 and probably YEARS of gaslighting - signs were there.

posts: 81   ·   registered: Oct. 21st, 2013   ·   location: Pennsylvania
id 6569840
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Scientist ( new member #40910) posted at 4:04 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

Of all the pathetic scenarios on SI, this has to be the worst (I am sorry to say...). What did he think she saw in him? "I knew she loved me because she didn't charge me as much as the others..." (?). What a sad old man... I am really sorry you are here and going through this, and wish you all the strength you need.

Me: 58
WW: 58
M: 36 years
Together 39 years
4 children, 1 grandchild
dday(1) July 2005; dday(2) September 2013

posts: 46   ·   registered: Oct. 7th, 2013   ·   location: UK
id 6569875
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momentintime ( member #16394) posted at 4:22 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

He was minimizing for his comfort and lack of responsibility.

Not to add to you pain, but I would imagine if she is contacting him this wasn't a one off. He needs to be honest and "get" how truly horrible his dong this was.

It is an awful blow when infidelity is discovered. It will take time (2-5 years) to recover. You may forgive, but you will never forget. He needs to understand how greatly he has damaged your relationship, rocked your sense of security and risked your health.

Take care.

BS-me FWS - him
D-day 8/04
R'd

"Global editing disclaimer - I edit almost everything I post, and I am not going to post why every time."...re: Bionical girl

posts: 3163   ·   registered: Sep. 29th, 2007   ·   location: New York
id 6569904
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painfulpast ( member #41038) posted at 5:48 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

Not to add to you pain, but I would imagine if she is contacting him this wasn't a one off.

I completely agree. Prostitutes don’t continue to write someone, unless he overpaid, was very easy to get rid of, or she has zero clients. Why would she keep chasing a 64 year old? I think there is more to the story – more visits, more communication, something.

It’s very rare that a WS comes clean the first time. You were told in August. Have you learned more since then? Have you asked, or have you just assumed he was being truthful?

DDay - 12/2010
Fully R'd - I love my husband

posts: 2249   ·   registered: Oct. 19th, 2013   ·   location: East Coast
id 6570054
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 6:14 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

I think it would have been great to respond with:

I'm so happy I could shit a rainbow. Oh by the way, while you made that drive I threw all your stuff in the yard, and changed the locks. You should be happy to know that your choices make me no longer love you.

HAHAHAHAHA Idiot.

Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 20380   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6570098
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 Gotmegood (original poster member #41407) posted at 9:28 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

Of course I suspect that he is lying about the 1x experience with the 20 yr old prostitute, and mainly BECAUSE she texted him to solicit another visit.

But let's see.....he's a lying cheater and she's a maladjusted, low-skilled , law breaker.....so who's going to tell me the truth? I've asked and asked and asked and that's all he is willing to cop to. Plus, he told me he couldn't even get hard enough for her to put the condom on, so all she could do was blow him. Mr E.D. Imagine the prostitute laughing at that ?

Problem is my heart is broken. My self esteem is in the toilet (where they belong, not me). And I am struggling to smile at anything.

Thank all for responding. This site has been immensely helpful.

Me: faithful wife 62.
Him: WH 64 , prostitute 20 yr old
DDay: 8-13-2013
Status: boinging up and down like a yo-yo

posts: 764   ·   registered: Nov. 20th, 2013   ·   location: Florida
id 6570366
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Truly ( member #40715) posted at 9:32 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID excuse for a man!

There are dark shadows on the earth, but its lights are stronger in the contrast.
Charles Dickens



posts: 266   ·   registered: Sep. 19th, 2013
id 6570371
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Truly ( member #40715) posted at 9:38 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

Sorry, that just makes me livid, I am often quite calm!

I'm so sorry but you should NOT feel bad about yourself AT ALL.

Quite clearly your WH has a problem. He thinks he is right. He is not. He is a fool.

And his foolishness will leave him a sad and lonely old man.

Be strong, you've done nothing to deserve such revolting and reprehensible treatment.

Look after yourself and 180 for you. It works, it helps and you will feel good about yourself.

Focus is now on YOU

Hugs (((((Gotmegood))))))

There are dark shadows on the earth, but its lights are stronger in the contrast.
Charles Dickens



posts: 266   ·   registered: Sep. 19th, 2013
id 6570377
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FightingBack ( member #34770) posted at 10:21 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

That is like saying, after having your knees broken with a baseball bat, "Aren't you GLAD I didn't stab you in the back?"

Me 53
WH 58
Married 25 years
4 children S30,D24, S23,S21
D-Day Nov. 29, 2011
15 year affair with married employee.
Together trying to make sense of it all!

posts: 1459   ·   registered: Feb. 9th, 2012
id 6570421
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somanyyears ( member #26970) posted at 10:35 PM on Thursday, November 21st, 2013

..

WHAT NEXT????

..maybe he'll be saying: "Aren't you glad she game me the senior citizen's discount?"..

..he was, no doubt, pretending he was back in High school..

..as we've said here a million times.. fantasyland at Disneyworld..

((((((Gmg)))))

smy

trust no other human- love only your pets. Reconciled I think! Me 77 Her 74 Married 52 yrs. 18 yr LTA with bff/lawyer. Little fucker died at 57.Brain tumour!

posts: 6080   ·   registered: Dec. 29th, 2009   ·   location: Ontario Canada
id 6570436
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 Gotmegood (original poster member #41407) posted at 5:14 AM on Friday, November 22nd, 2013

Interestingly, most of my *mind movies* had featured my H (64) and the 20 yr old prostitute and my reactions were jealousy....she's so young!!!, and resulting feelings of inadequacy about me and my body. After reading your responses I see him in the movie for the sad, pathetic fool that he is. Thank you for that, I guess. Better than beating myself up.

Me: faithful wife 62.
Him: WH 64 , prostitute 20 yr old
DDay: 8-13-2013
Status: boinging up and down like a yo-yo

posts: 764   ·   registered: Nov. 20th, 2013   ·   location: Florida
id 6570830
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