D-day OW#1 2/2004; R for 6 years; D-day OW#2 5/2010
My ex spent thousands of dollars in lawyer fees fighting me on this one certain show shovel that he wanted. I had agreed to many many things that he could take, but the snow shovel?
My lawyer was like "spend the $30, buy a new shovel, and give him this shovel", but at the time, I had no other snow shovel, and didn't have the money to splurge on having to buy myself a snow shovel, after everything else he had taken from me. I live in Buffalo, NY. I need a shovel.
So, she put in the final agreement, among the list of items that I HAD to give him from the house, she just put "shovel". I gave him a shovel all right, a garden shovel. Not the shovel he wanted.
I proudly use that shovel every winter.
I felt like he had taken every thing else from me, then he wanted the shovel too? How the hell was I supposed to shovel? He wanted the shovel to shovel the OW's driveway, where he had moved in. I wasn't having it.
The thing that worked out well for me, was that he was so focued on the stuff from the house, that he let things like custody and visitation slide. This fight for the shovel and other tools took the attention away from the fact that he gets no overnights, and the only holidays he gets is Christmas Eve until bedtime, and Father's Day.
He thought he won, when in actuality, I won.
I would not let him bully you, but if the papers say that you HAVE to give him the TV, I guess you have to do it. But I wouldn't hand it over so easily, and I wouldn't be against tampering with it either.
[This message edited by sparkysable at 9:09 AM, November 26th (Tuesday)]
Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.