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Divorce/Separation :
Musings

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 Ashland13 (original poster member #38378) posted at 2:26 PM on Tuesday, November 26th, 2013

DD and I were grocery shopping recently and had to buy eggs. We were looking for a container of them without any broken ones. It wasn't easy to find.

There was one container with one broken one only and she was upset at this. I myself was noticing all of the good ones this time.

On the way home, I got to thinking symbolism again, as it is often prevalent nowadays.

Why is it that the mind seems to focus on negative things that happen to us or one negative person in our life, versus all of the good things that happen or all of the good people that are left? I know for me, I have to work very hard to make the good stand out more and block the bad.

I recognize that negativity is sensational and more of an impact for some reason, but I don't know why this is. Many people are left in my life but the major player is gone. And he turned out to be so negative that in some ways I guess I should be glad now. Still he causes negativity but I try to block it and instead concentrate on the good.

I try to impart this on DD and wonder if it's something we do automatically as we grow up? She will focus on negative things and be disappointed even when a turn out was good or good things did happen. So I try to steer her thinking when I can, and mine in the process. It's not easy.

Stop sign.

Ashland 13

A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess

Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.

-George Washington

posts: 3034   ·   registered: Feb. 7th, 2013   ·   location: New England
id 6575027
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ninebark ( member #24534) posted at 3:40 PM on Tuesday, November 26th, 2013

It is so easy to focus on the bad isn't it.

DS has come a long way in that department, but I owe a lot of that to his martial arts class. They taught him that failure is not a bad thing, that it is an opportunity for learning too. If you did not pass your belt test then it is an opportunity to learn where you need to improve. He has taken that lesson to heart.

He not longer focus on bad but rather what he can learn from a bad situation and how to make it a positive. I am so thankful for that. Today he tries out for basketball, he only started playing this year so he may not make the team. He said it doesn't matter he wants to try for the experience.

So now we celebrate everything. Good or bad because we can learn and grow from all of it. He makes me very proud.

[This message edited by ninebark at 9:40 AM, November 26th (Tuesday)]

BS (me) 40
WH - 48
Married 12 years
DS - 12
D-day 06/21/09
Separated....hopefully divorcing soon.

posts: 630   ·   registered: Jun. 23rd, 2009   ·   location: Canada
id 6575137
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