HI Rosie79, welcome to SI. Some good people around here to help you through this shitstorm. I am pissed for you so excuse my bluntness...
Also tells me I threw away the most faithful person I will ever have, and this is my fault since I told some of our friends.
This is a line of complete and utter bullshit that he is throwing your way. He doesn't know the meaning of the word faithful. He threw himself away when he decided to have an affair that he is blatantly throwing in your face. Please understand that nothing he did or continues to do is your fault. Nothing you did caused him to have an Affair. He made that choice himself when he had SOOOOO many other options. He could have talked to you, gone to counseling, hell even field for Divorce if he wasn't happy but instead he is blameshifting, deflecting and trying to stir the pot so he doesn't have to take a long hard look at himself. Continue with a hard 180. I mean don't do ANYTHING for him. Don't leave him food to eat, don't wash his clothes, anything you did for him in the past stops. You focus completely on you so you can detach and make decisions you need to make.
Do I confront him with this information or continue the 180 so that I can move forward with my life?
Confronting him won't make him stop and he knows you know about the A. If you live in a fault state keep all the evidence for your L. IMO, don't contact him at all. Act like he is dead to you and detach as best you can. He is using the confrontations with you to justify continuing his Affair. He wants to cake eat with both you and OW. The confrontations are because you won't get back in line and let him have both of you. Don't fall for that shit. When he gets home do your best to ignore him. The 180 isn't about getting him back it's about empowering yourself so you can make better choices and decisions about what you want going forward. Start putting together a plan for getting out and focus on that. Keep posting it helps. Remember one day at a time and if you fall off the 180 just get right back up and start it again.
ETA: Do what you can when you can. Just remember that if he is still in the A then he is still going to lie to you. That's what unremorseful spouses do. So take care of yourself. It's still early for you in the process so do what you can right now to take care of you. Take care of yourself and don't take his bullshit.
[This message edited by 7yrsflushed at 8:44 PM, November 26th (Tuesday)]