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gardens64 (original poster member #38449) posted at 2:47 AM on Wednesday, November 27th, 2013
Got an invitation to a wedding which was requesting "honeyfunds" as a wedding gift, basically cash for the honeymoon. I thought wedding gifts were for a couple to start a new life? Oh well. I was thinking I had a really simple wedding but I could sure use a divorce registry right now! Instead of "honeyfunds" how about "lawyer funds", "discovery funds", and hey I might need some stuff for a new place! 
PurpleBirch ( member #39170) posted at 2:49 AM on Wednesday, November 27th, 2013
LMAO!
Do you think people would contribute to my lawyer fund?
Me: BS (32)
Him: WH (31)
Married 3 years.
Confessed to PA April 21 2013.
DS (6), DS (18 months)
Aug 30 2013 He gives me back his ring with an ultimatum: "Get over it or get out".
Status: Done like dinner
Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 7:29 AM on Wednesday, November 27th, 2013
Yep! I sure could use a lawyer fund! And a home repair fund to get the gutters cleaned out.
Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU
neverbeokay ( member #8275) posted at 11:23 AM on Wednesday, November 27th, 2013
I thought about this a lot at the last company I worked for, it was filled with 20 and 30 somethings and every other month I would get hit up for a wedding or baby gift for someone I barely knew. My wedding and babies were far behind me so I knew there would never be a gift for me.
It reminds me of the SATC episode where Carrie does a wedding registry for herself to get a pair of Manolo shoes. Kind of crass but it did make the point.
Dreamboat ( member #10506) posted at 1:38 PM on Wednesday, November 27th, 2013
Hell, I just wanted someone to bring over a damn casserole...I didn't even get food after the death of my M!! 
But I do like your idea. We could start a new trend
And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine
jackie89 ( member #38271) posted at 2:41 PM on Wednesday, November 27th, 2013
Great idea! 
Hell, I just wanted someone to bring over a damn casserole...I didn't even get food after the death of my M!!
LadyQ ( member #32847) posted at 3:31 PM on Wednesday, November 27th, 2013
Lol, now that's a great idea!
Tune out the noise of what others tell you about who you are and work it out for yourself...
PurpleRose ( member #33129) posted at 3:39 PM on Wednesday, November 27th, 2013
I actually had a discussion with a group of my girlfriends about this topic-- one of their husbands got diagnosed with cancer about a year after my dday. Everyone knew what I was going through- I didn't hide it from them.
The girls rallied around this family, drove kids to school/practices, cleaned her house, babysat, did grocery shopping and made a meal calendar so 5 nights a week this family had a hot dinner delivered.
Me? Nothing. Not even phone calls to see how it was going. (Which I do understand-- back then it was on/off so much.)
I told them how much that had hurt me at the time. Not one has been through infidelity and said they had no idea.
I said it was a death for me. The death of my marriage. The death of my husband. The death of my family unit. :(
Makes me get mad thinking about it still. They did feel horrible, and are all super supportive, but they just didn't know better.
divorced the Dooosh 8/13
*****************************
Dance like nobody is watching,
Text and email like it will be used in court someday...
Sad in AZ ( member #24239) posted at 3:39 PM on Wednesday, November 27th, 2013
I brought this up some time ago. I think divorce showers are a great idea--both men and women. It's tough starting over again, especially when you're leaving your memories behind. A good party with lots of alcohol and some handy household items would be nice. 
It still tugs at my heart when I go into a housewares department and think about the nice things I had before I moved out. But then I get over it by thinking about the 280 lb. item I left behind.
You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter. Your voice matters. Your story matters. Your life matters. Always.
Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-63
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011
gardens64 (original poster member #38449) posted at 5:32 PM on Wednesday, November 27th, 2013
Yes it really is like a death but we have to soldier through like it is not. It is hurtful I agree. My close friends are very supportive but that broad community support is missing...
LMAO at the 280 lb item left behind!
Let's see, I could use a casserole, or a cake! A massage would also be nice! Or a weekend getaway. Can I register for that?
Jayne Doe ( member #32664) posted at 8:20 PM on Wednesday, November 27th, 2013
Hell, I just wanted someone to bring over a damn casserole...I didn't even get food after the death of my M!!
^^^^ This !!!!
That was my biggest shock is how people didn't do this. Especially when I was going thru the I can't eat phase and still had mouths to feed. It was always "call me anytime you need to talk". Just bring me some food that I can throw down at the dinner table, dangit
Divorce Registry? I love it!
Everyday is a blank canvas, and only you hold the brush.
30y M traded in for a POM (pathetic Old Maid 46, 2 kids from different dads. never married)
S 11/11, D final 1/14.
Charity411 ( member #41033) posted at 9:57 PM on Wednesday, November 27th, 2013
This is a great idea. I know some people have divorce parties. I went to one. Believe it or not both the husband and wife were there.
What I really think is a great idea is the lawyer funds thing. It's not such a stretch. Think about the fact that people donated to the Jodi Arias defense fund. Just sayin.
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