SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

gardens64 posted 11/26/2013 20:47 PM

Got an invitation to a wedding which was requesting "honeyfunds" as a wedding gift, basically cash for the honeymoon. I thought wedding gifts were for a couple to start a new life? Oh well. I was thinking I had a really simple wedding but I could sure use a divorce registry right now! Instead of "honeyfunds" how about "lawyer funds", "discovery funds", and hey I might need some stuff for a new place!

PurpleBirch posted 11/26/2013 20:49 PM

LMAO!

Do you think people would contribute to my lawyer fund?

Nature_Girl posted 11/27/2013 01:29 AM

Yep! I sure could use a lawyer fund! And a home repair fund to get the gutters cleaned out.

neverbeokay posted 11/27/2013 05:23 AM

I thought about this a lot at the last company I worked for, it was filled with 20 and 30 somethings and every other month I would get hit up for a wedding or baby gift for someone I barely knew. My wedding and babies were far behind me so I knew there would never be a gift for me.

It reminds me of the SATC episode where Carrie does a wedding registry for herself to get a pair of Manolo shoes. Kind of crass but it did make the point.

Dreamboat posted 11/27/2013 07:38 AM

Hell, I just wanted someone to bring over a damn casserole...I didn't even get food after the death of my M!!

But I do like your idea. We could start a new trend

jackie89 posted 11/27/2013 08:41 AM

Great idea!

Hell, I just wanted someone to bring over a damn casserole...I didn't even get food after the death of my M!!

LadyQ posted 11/27/2013 09:31 AM

Lol, now that's a great idea!

PurpleRose posted 11/27/2013 09:39 AM

I actually had a discussion with a group of my girlfriends about this topic-- one of their husbands got diagnosed with cancer about a year after my dday. Everyone knew what I was going through- I didn't hide it from them.

The girls rallied around this family, drove kids to school/practices, cleaned her house, babysat, did grocery shopping and made a meal calendar so 5 nights a week this family had a hot dinner delivered.

Me? Nothing. Not even phone calls to see how it was going. (Which I do understand-- back then it was on/off so much.)

I told them how much that had hurt me at the time. Not one has been through infidelity and said they had no idea.

I said it was a death for me. The death of my marriage. The death of my husband. The death of my family unit. :(

Makes me get mad thinking about it still. They did feel horrible, and are all super supportive, but they just didn't know better.

Sad in AZ posted 11/27/2013 09:39 AM

I brought this up some time ago. I think divorce showers are a great idea--both men and women. It's tough starting over again, especially when you're leaving your memories behind. A good party with lots of alcohol and some handy household items would be nice.

It still tugs at my heart when I go into a housewares department and think about the nice things I had before I moved out. But then I get over it by thinking about the 280 lb. item I left behind.

gardens64 posted 11/27/2013 11:32 AM

Yes it really is like a death but we have to soldier through like it is not. It is hurtful I agree. My close friends are very supportive but that broad community support is missing...

LMAO at the 280 lb item left behind!

Let's see, I could use a casserole, or a cake! A massage would also be nice! Or a weekend getaway. Can I register for that?

Jayne Doe posted 11/27/2013 14:20 PM

Hell, I just wanted someone to bring over a damn casserole...I didn't even get food after the death of my M!!

^^^^ This !!!!

That was my biggest shock is how people didn't do this. Especially when I was going thru the I can't eat phase and still had mouths to feed. It was always "call me anytime you need to talk". Just bring me some food that I can throw down at the dinner table, dangit

Divorce Registry? I love it!

Charity411 posted 11/27/2013 15:57 PM

This is a great idea. I know some people have divorce parties. I went to one. Believe it or not both the husband and wife were there.

What I really think is a great idea is the lawyer funds thing. It's not such a stretch. Think about the fact that people donated to the Jodi Arias defense fund. Just sayin.