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brkn_heartd (original poster member #30396) posted at 1:26 AM on Friday, November 29th, 2013
Thanksgiving used to always be a big tradition at our home. We were usually the hosts for the family gathering. My Mother died in early 2009 and my FWH started his A in August 2009. He was in the middle of it in Nov 2009. We went to our son's home that year for Thanksgiving. They typically celebrated with friends and not family. It was very obvious that we crimped the party (i.e. no pot allowed with parents around).We haven't been back for Thanksgiving. Not to mention FWH was being an a$$ that day to me. Since then we have moved farther away from our family for employment.
It is now 2013. We had a very nice, quiet day with the just the 2 of us. Our daughter was working and we will do a family dinner tomorrow. It has been a very nice day. The pain is gone. We did briefly speak of it today. During our blessing tonight at dinner, he thanked God for me giving him another chance, and he was choking up during his prayer.
I tell this story to those that are just experiencing the pain of betrayal for your first holiday season. It does get better. It is possible to have a holiday without the A dominating everything about the day. R is possible if FWS is committed to trying.
SI has made a huge impact in my life and recovery. I only wished I had found them when I was dealing with the A. There is so much support and wisdom. I am very Thankful that the wonderful people here offer so much support.
Me-57 BS
Him 65-WS
Married 38 yrs, together 40
Affair Aug-Dec 09
official D-12/14/09
broke NC 1/31/10
second D 3/19/10
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 1:41 AM on Friday, November 29th, 2013
Thank you for the message of hope! I'm glad things are going better for you. 
Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 6:33 AM on Friday, November 29th, 2013
Great report, brkn_heartd!
"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom
Shattered-Heart ( member #32165) posted at 6:48 AM on Friday, November 29th, 2013
I'm glad you had a nice, peaceful day. Hope to follow in your shoes right now, as for me the season from now to VDay is one giant trigger.
Hope you have a wonderful dinner tomorrow night, too.
Me BW Him WH "The trick is to keep breathing." - Garbage
yousaid4ever ( member #32626) posted at 8:39 AM on Friday, November 29th, 2013
Thank you, it is so encouraging to hear that it can and does get better. Am very happy for you and for the Thanksgiving you shared with your hubby.
I took your words and I believed
In everything you said to me
Cause you said forever
And ever, who knew?......Pink
BS(me) 59...STBXSAWH 59
Married 40 yrs/4 grown children, 5 grandchildren
DD's-1st on 10/75, now too many too count.
yousaid4ever ( member #32626) posted at 8:40 AM on Friday, November 29th, 2013
sorry, double post.
[This message edited by yousaid4ever at 2:41 AM, November 29th (Friday)]
I took your words and I believed
In everything you said to me
Cause you said forever
And ever, who knew?......Pink
BS(me) 59...STBXSAWH 59
Married 40 yrs/4 grown children, 5 grandchildren
DD's-1st on 10/75, now too many too count.
TennisTC ( member #41330) posted at 3:29 PM on Friday, November 29th, 2013
Thank you for your post. This is my first holiday season after the A, which was going on this time last year. The holiday season feels tainted to me this year, and it's encouraging to hear that it's possible it won't always be this way. I hope you have a wonderful dinner tonight.
Me: BW Him: WH (Both early 30's)
Married 11 years with a DD 7
R'ing
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