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Newest Member: bigpockets (45700)

User Topic: How did u tell the kids
confused52204
♀ 16913
Member # 16913
Default  Posted: 8:02 AM, November 29th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How did they Handel it? I have a dd 6 years old from previous marriage. She is on vacation w her dad this week. When she gets back my xbf will b gone. I have not told her anything but I'm sure she has picked up on it. Will she b mad at me forever? She loves him so much! Should I have him say goodbye? I just don't want him to blame me bc he does. He says I'm turning my back on him!

I just had to do this. He was on CL for 2 years posting ads for men and women. Says he was depressed. I don't buy it. We tried for a year. I can't get the things he posted out if my kind. They will b there forever. And that's not a way I want to start a marriage off. Is that selfish of me?


Posts: 526 | Registered: Nov 2007
confused52204
♀ 16913
Member # 16913
Default  Posted: 8:10 AM, November 29th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He was just my bf for 4 years so he does not have any legal rites to c her again. Nor do I want him to as it would b hard both for of us!

Posts: 526 | Registered: Nov 2007
sparkysable
♀ 3703
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 8:11 AM, November 29th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Will she b mad at me forever?
No! Don't blame yourself! You didn't do this, he did.

Should I have him say goodbye?
Personally, I would NOT.

I just don't want him to blame me bc he does. He says I'm turning my back on him!
Wait, he says that YOU, are turning you back on HIM, because you wouldn't accept his CL trolling? Is he for real? Are you fucking kidding me? He's delusional.
We tried for a year.
After the first CL ad, most people would have been GONE.

Is that selfish of me?

Wait....let me get this straight, HE had affairs on craigslist, YOU took him back, HE continued the behavior, and YOU are worried if YOUR daughter, not even HIS, will be mad at YOU? And then you are asking if YOU are selfish?

Honey, it's blaringly obvious who is the selfish one here. Please stop blaming yourself for this. HE is broken, fucked up individual. He cannot be fixed by you or by anyone. He's fucked in the head. Seriously. You are dodging a bullet here.


D-day OW#1 2/2004; R for 6 years; D-day OW#2 5/2010

Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.


Posts: 3477 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
confused52204
♀ 16913
Member # 16913
Default  Posted: 8:28 AM, November 29th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This happen from march 2010-march 2012. We purchased house together oct 2012. He says he sold his house to b w me. There is no proof he was w anyone. He did take lue detector. I found all this out oct 2012 1 week after we moved into our home together !

Posts: 526 | Registered: Nov 2007
confused52204
♀ 16913
Member # 16913
Default  Posted: 6:37 PM, November 29th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

????

Posts: 526 | Registered: Nov 2007
Nature_Girl
♀ 32554
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 10:06 PM, November 29th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Don't have him say goodbye. He's not a safe person, you can't control what comes out of his mouth, who knows what kind of emotional bomb he'd shove in her soul. Keep him away from her.

As for what to tell her, you can tell her that he broke some very big promises and also told some really big lies. These were so big and so important it meant you can't get married, ever.

She's too young for the details. The above is the God's honest truth and age-appropriate.

I'm so sorry.


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU

Posts: 10004 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
confused52204
♀ 16913
Member # 16913
Default  Posted: 8:33 AM, December 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bumping

Posts: 526 | Registered: Nov 2007
confused52204
♀ 16913
Member # 16913
Default  Posted: 9:19 PM, December 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bumping again for advice

Posts: 526 | Registered: Nov 2007
Topic Posts: 8

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