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Newest Member: Anderson78

Divorce/Separation :
Crappy hotel update

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 sunsetslost (original poster member #39885) posted at 10:20 PM on Saturday, November 30th, 2013

Beginning week three in my crappy hotel room. Things are getting easier. I'm getting better at staying busy here. There are a number of bars and restaurants within walking distance so I don't have to drive in holiday shopping traffic.

I went to go get a check from STBX. It was really really cold that morning. She was miserable. I parked far away from her office building and moved and spoke very very slowly. I have to admit I enjoyed watching her squirm a bit in the cold. She owes me some more money but I'll get it. If she bullshits me I'll drop the hammer.

I've been able to think long term a little more now that I'm out from under the house. I need to save some more money here before I can quit my job and head to the beach. It's been nice to rest and relax a bit. I'm trying to transfer my job but I work for an evil corporation.

I'm not entirely sure when the family condo will be ready but I'm proving to myself that I'm comfortable in a small room/apartment. Whenever I'm ready.

I'm surviving, existing. I still find myself sulking with the shades pulled sometimes but I'm making an effort to reach out more and more.

Hope everybody had a good turkey day

Divorced 7/11/14. New Beginning on the Gulf of Mexico. It's real nice.

posts: 800   ·   registered: Jul. 20th, 2013   ·   location: The beach.
id 6579739
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welcome14 ( member #26741) posted at 12:16 AM on Sunday, December 1st, 2013

I'm sorry to hear you are still in the hotel, hope the condo gets done soon. I think you are sounding much better with each post, and a little gloom here and there is completely normal. ((hugs)) and I hope you had a good (or as good as the first one gets) Tday also. Blessings to you!

Bs- me
Someone I used to know- Him
Nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home- nikki sixx

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.

posts: 1566   ·   registered: Dec. 16th, 2009   ·   location: clarksville, tn/ Ft Campbell
id 6579847
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PhoenixRising88 ( member #35214) posted at 12:24 AM on Sunday, December 1st, 2013

Sending you smiles. (((sunsetslost))).

Me: BS(45)Him: EX, aka "The Dink"(52). D-Day#1 12/22/11. D-Day#2 5/23/13. Divorced 1/10/14.

New chapter of my life- married 11/13/15 to the man I'd thought I would never find.

Throw me to the wolves and I'll return leading the pack.

posts: 443   ·   registered: Apr. 2nd, 2012   ·   location: North Texas
id 6579854
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DefeatedDad ( member #41026) posted at 10:07 AM on Sunday, December 1st, 2013

Sunset you have become a real hero to me. Reading your threads has inspired me. I know that if my R does go south, I can make it and I am strong enough.

I'm sorry your hotel stay has been rough. Those long-term hotels can be lonely.

What did you do for Thanksgiving?

Me - BS 46
Wife - WS 44
Son 13, Daughter 17
Married 22 years
D-day May 16, 2012
TT D-Day 2 9/25/17
TT D-Day 3 1/02/14

Divorcing her sorry a--.

posts: 217   ·   registered: Oct. 17th, 2013   ·   location: New Mexico
id 6580185
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Lostandpregnant ( member #41433) posted at 12:41 PM on Sunday, December 1st, 2013

((Hugs))

He left me 18 weeks pregnant with twins for another.I am a Licensed Private Investigator..it even happens to us.

posts: 354   ·   registered: Nov. 23rd, 2013   ·   location: Canada
id 6580226
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 sunsetslost (original poster member #39885) posted at 3:03 PM on Sunday, December 1st, 2013

Thanks guys.

DD: my parents are about an hour from where I am staying. I drove over, watched some football and hung out with family. Then I came back here and drank a bottle and a half of wine, fell asleep at 9:30. I read how yours was

Divorced 7/11/14. New Beginning on the Gulf of Mexico. It's real nice.

posts: 800   ·   registered: Jul. 20th, 2013   ·   location: The beach.
id 6580318
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NewMom0220 ( member #39036) posted at 3:30 PM on Sunday, December 1st, 2013

Sunsetslost,

I love the irony of your username. It seems more like you are gaining sunsets if you have a condo on the beach waiting for you.

I'm in my own version of a crappy hotel room...my parents' house (which is beautiful and not crappy, but I'm living in a room like a teenager). I don't have my new place picked out yet, but I want to be in my own place by February. This transition has been really difficult because I'm pretty independent and haven't even lived near my family in 13 years.

I feel like a refugee or a nomad. I keep a lot of things in my car. It's been nice not having daily contact with my STBX, but sometimes his absence stands out to me during various times. He's still a POS loser but when you start moving on there's a learning curve and my memory of how things were seeps in here and there. Anyway, I know it's hard...but you are doing great. Be thankful you don't have children with her. I read your bio and we had trouble conceiving as well. It took a toll on the relationship, but I foolishly thought we were in it for better or worse. Be grateful she's not dragging a young child through this BS with you.

(((Sunsetslost)))

Me: BS 37
Him: WS 37
20 month old DS
Married 5 years, together 8, DIVORCING!!! (taking forever)
DDay: 3/1/13 (4 Month PA while I was pregnant)
Sometimes all you have to do is forget what you feel and remember what you deserve.

posts: 418   ·   registered: Apr. 18th, 2013
id 6580346
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 sunsetslost (original poster member #39885) posted at 4:38 PM on Sunday, December 1st, 2013

NewMom,

I'm grateful every day. Relatively speaking I'm

Much better off than many on here and I know that.

The name comes from our past. We were married on the beach at sun set. It was the most amazing one I've ever seen. It was post card perfect. We would vacation at least twice a year and were (at least I was ) chasing that moment again. Saw some that were close.

I went to FL a few weeks after d day and I took half of the sand we had gathered from the exact wedding spot. As the sun sank into the water I dumped the sand into the Gulf. It was my last "lost" sunset. And at the same time my first "found" one. The peace and beauty of sunsets were mine. Score we got together. I shared them with her. I'm taking them back.

Divorced 7/11/14. New Beginning on the Gulf of Mexico. It's real nice.

posts: 800   ·   registered: Jul. 20th, 2013   ·   location: The beach.
id 6580407
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FaithFool ( member #20150) posted at 5:06 PM on Sunday, December 1st, 2013

You have a great attitude, and your progress in such a short space of time is truly inspiring.

DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

posts: 21594   ·   registered: Jul. 7th, 2008   ·   location: Canada
id 6580435
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IrishLass518 ( member #34373) posted at 5:08 PM on Sunday, December 1st, 2013

Sunsets, you're doing incredibly well and I love that you took your sunset spot back. I love the symbolism of putting the sand back and reclaiming that part of you. That is a huge step forward in your journey.

Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

posts: 1858   ·   registered: Jan. 2nd, 2012   ·   location: WA
id 6580437
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