Admit to your kiddo that you were upset and should not have acted like that.
I do this with Teslet, usually I say something along the lines of, "mom was really frustrated and yelled because she was frustrated. I need to take a deep breath before I talk when I get frustrated. I'm really sorry, do you think you can forgive me?"
I totally get how you must hate that your kiddo is doing stuff with the OW and having fun. Think of her as a glorified babysitter that is trying to get your kid to like her. When Teslet talks about the neat thing he did with stripper whore, I try to channel my mommy somewhere else and listen to him as if he was one of my students. It's very tough but remember, you want your kiddo to never feel like she can't talk to you.
You didn't blow it. You gave your daughter an opportunity to see an adult as a fallible, remorseful human being. That can be a very good thing. ((((((ideservebetter))))))