Hello...
an unforeseen wacky event has knocked me out of my "normal" crazytown orbit, and flung me head long back into SI world...sigh... and I was doing so well :)
Truth: the only time I ever came here anymore had to do with the "investigative forum",... So much good info there, love it!
Ok, I did lurk, and catch up w/ people's stories, but I'm not a good writer, and have a hard time harnessing my thoughts and organizing them in a semi-coherent let's not go off on a tangent intelligent stream, so I did not contribute much to the newbies... And, let's face it, I'm not that wise ...true- dat :)
Here goes:
Been divorced since 2010, living apart with new partners (both of us) since late 2008 (him) early 2009 (me).
As early as 2008, got the bawling/ sorry/,poor me, I'm finally reaping what I deserve event.
Then in 2009-2010, the reminiscing emails.
then in 2011 the drunken email midnight confessions and realizations: "It wasn't the fire dept that contributed to our breakup... it was YOU KNOW WHO in the FD... Yeah, duh (she was a medic) Really, now you're seeing it? ???
Then in 2012 and 2013 the ...Emails with the regrets, admissions of how stupid he was, wishing he could push a reset button, wishing we had spent more time together doing things as a family... bla bla bla
The true confessions that he's not happy, and he feels trapped.
Why would an ex say to the wife he cheated on, 5 years later, when he's still with the OW (living together) all these things?
is he:
A. feeling total regret and wishing he hadn't been such an asshat?
B. Unhappy and missing his wife?
C. fishing, hoping to get a little action?
D. (my go-to all around makes perfect sense to me answer): All of the above?
Any input appreciated, even the clobbers from 2X4's wondering why I still have headspace for this shit?
I asked him the other day if he saw the humor in our situation ( I'm a shitty cook and not really tidy, and my new significant other is a neat freak and gourmet cook, getting me out of 2 jobs I used to hate) hehehehe... His response: "it's funny in a tragic/comic sense'. he wasn't smiling when he said it.
I knew he'd regret it. Doesn't make one bit of difference now. He could have saved it when I still loved him. I just wish I had the mean gene to forward his lamenting emails to OW...
More on her in a bit.
TA