Topic: I lost my rock at 507pm 12/2/2013
Member # 16305
| Posted: 5:44 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
My friend, Stacy was my rock during the early days of the affair. When I was pregnant and stuck in the hospital for 6 weeks, she talked to me in the wee hours of the night (west coast to east coast), literally every night and make me laugh. Iremember her saying "girl, you just blew my wig off" when I said something that made her laugh or suprised her.
She is the reason my son was so fearless. Yep. All her fault. Why? Well, while pregnant, she said to me "your son is just like my nephew". When I asked what her nephew was like, she replied, "He jumped out of a second story window to see what it was like".
We met when I transfered to Hollywood H.S. in the 10th grade. In the 11th, I was in another school. I asked for an opportunity transfer for the 12th grade. Even tho we hung out in a group of 6, she was pretty much my only friend at hhs. We would go off campus together at lunch (our class was the last allowed off campus).
We lost touch after I moved to CO.
Thanks to a classmate site, we hooked up again
There is a street where I live that I hate. I remember pulling off to that side street to talk to stacey about spouse and his a. This was 5 yrs ago. Now instead of the street being tainted by memories of spouse, it holds sweet memories of stacy....it was yet another time she offered to send me a cast iron skillet to whack spouse upside the head with (and everyone of those skillets now in my house have always reminded me of stac and always will).
She kept her distance from me these last few years. She didnt totally push me away as she kept me as a fbf friend and once in awhile commented on my photo or post.
The other thing about stacy was during the affair, she did want me to leave him, but she made the situation about me. She made me laugh. She didnt get angry and say I should leave. She was different
Anyway...I tried several times to thank her for what she did for me during those years. I tried telling her how wonderful she was. I hope she understood.
Stacy, girl, I love you to pieces. I hope I can get my crap together to make you proud.
She went into the hospital with an infection. The meds sent her into a coma. They were going to operate on the infected part. Her heart gave out
She leaves behind her dog and many, many people who loved her.
People tell you exactly who they are...why expect them to be what they are not ....will be divorcing
Finally fealing peace.
Posts: 8626 | Registered: Sep 2007
Member # 2
| Posted: 7:03 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
I'm sorry you lost your friend
"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)
My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.
Posts: 199999 | Registered: May 2002
Member # 33338
| Posted: 7:05 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
I'm so sorry. That's a huge loss. Prayers for her family and for you.
Him, 40 (JMSSC)
married 18 years. In R. We are making it. The past does not define who we are today.
Posts: 2998 | Registered: Sep 2011 | From: South Carolina
Member # 36869
| Posted: 7:25 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
I'm so sorry you lost your friend. (((Hugs))
Be careful what you wish for the most - you may get it.
Posts: 426 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: VA
Member # 32554
| Posted: 7:33 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
I'm so sorry. ((((HUGS)))
Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
Posts: 10268 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
Member # 21101
| Posted: 7:36 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
That is a lovely tribute to a true friend. I am so sorry for your loss.
((((and peace and strength))))
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy
Posts: 9033 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
|Sad in AZ|
Member # 24239
| Posted: 7:41 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
I'm so sorry, sully. Carry those memories with you like a lamp in the darkness.
May your 2015 be more FUCK YEAH! than fuck this
Posts: 20740 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
Member # 41433
| Posted: 7:59 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
I'm so sorry for your loss :(
He left me 18 weeks pregnant with twins for another.I am a Licensed Private Investigator..it even happens to us.
Posts: 354 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: Canada
Member # 33699
| Posted: 8:06 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
I'm very sorry for your loss sully.
"Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indominable will" - Mahatma Gandi
"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - Aubrie
Posts: 3614 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Georgia
Member # 25001
| Posted: 8:25 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
I am so sorry for your loss. Sending you (((HUGS))) and strength to get through this difficult time.
Me - BS, 39 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS10, DD7
Married, for now... (4+ D-Day - listed in profile.)
Posts: 5854 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: In the darkest depths of hell!
Member # 15584
| Posted: 8:35 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
Failure is success if we learn from it.
Posts: 4265 | Registered: Aug 2007 | From: michigan
Member # 17460
| Posted: 9:13 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
So sorry for your loss, sully.
Fidelity isn't a feeling...it's a choice.
"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
DS - 31 - Yikes!
Posts: 21155 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: Been Through Hell...On My Way Back
Member # 11224
| Posted: 9:32 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
So, so sorry Sully. Loss of a good friend is incredibly hard... I even have found it more difficult than the loss of my beloved grandparents.
I lost my own Stacy (seriously - the same name) in August at age 40 to breast cancer. She was my best friend for 20+ years.
My thoughts will be with you during this difficult time. It sounds like you have some awesome memories of her... write them down. Doing so will give you comfort now, and you will enjoy them with a warm heart through the tears when you reread them in the future.
Posts: 1052 | Registered: Jul 2006
Member # 19946
| Posted: 11:07 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
Wow. That must be such a shock! From an infection to a coma and out in a short time. I am so sorry for your loss. I am glad you had someone good in your life. ((((SM)))))
BS, now age 54, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years M and 20 together. In some ways I have not 'gotten over it'. But I am resilient and have created a good life where I am mostly happy.
Posts: 6023 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California
Member # 18449
| Posted: 11:07 AM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
Posts: 11808 | Registered: Mar 2008
Member # 30079
| Posted: 1:58 PM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.
Posts: 1957 | Registered: Nov 2010
Member # 30314
| Posted: 2:08 PM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
((sully)) and so unexpected! I'm so sorry.
his Dday: 2/10 but TT until 7/11
my Ddays: 1/12, 4/12 broken NC 12/12
me (WW/BS): 48
4 kiddos in mid 20's
“Most things will be okay eventually, but not everything will be. Acceptance is a small, quiet room.”
Posts: 6087 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Midwest
Member # 26531
| Posted: 3:10 PM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
I'm sorry for your loss.
Me: BSO - 46
Him: FWSO - 69
DS - 13
D-Day - 12-11-09,
R - he finally came home
Your life is an Occasion. Rise to it. - Mr. Magorium, "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium"
Posts: 24931 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Florida
Member # 32943
| Posted: 3:19 PM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
That was a wonderful tribute - I am so sorry for your loss. Rest in peace, Stacy.
Me: BS, 40's.
Posts: 1839 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: West Coast
Member # 41135
| Posted: 3:37 PM, December 3rd (Tuesday), 2013|
What a rockin great friend. Hugs to you Sully. Hope that someday I can be a "stacy" to someone in need.
Just remember to pay it forward in her honor.
Me BW 52, Him WH 48
Married 13 years,
2 DDs (12 and 10)
D-Day Confirmed 10/24/13 suspected before that but did not want to believe it.
WH filed for D 11/12/13
2/8/14 WH asked if he could come home.
Posts: 277 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Midwest
|Topic Posts: 24|