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What a nightmare, conclusion

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whichwaysup posted 12/5/2013 16:24 PM

First, thank you to the kind words on my 1st post. I'm going to try to finish my story now... After I found the track phone I immediately began reading everything, it was unbelievable what I learnt in mere minutes. Almost a month earlier my WH had joined a website called seekingarrangements (for sugar daddies/ babies- a cute name for what it really is, prostitution!). He was exchanging texts w/ 9 different whores, it was very clear he had met w/ 4 of them. He claims he screwed 3 & not the 4th b/c she didn't look like her profile picture (as though he suddenly had standards).
When I did confront him that night he was drunk & his reaction was heartless, tried blaming me etc.. I gave him the best answer I could think of- a very hard kick in the balls & walked out. Being pregnant & no where to go, I waited til I'd calmed down & returned to find him passed out in our bed so I retreated to the couch & waited.
When he woke in the am, he was completely different, remorseful is putting it mildly. He's saying & doing all the right things: deleted online profile, gave me access to work office & computer, hasn't drank & is coming home at a normal hour. He's answering all of my questions & we immediately started MC. But I'm not sure how I will ever look at him the same way or ever feel safe w/ him again. I do believe the WS can change, but I feel like his actions have changed me to much for R. Right now I'm trying R for my son & unborn baby, but I'm not sure it's the best thing for me. Everything is just so F'd up, how does time ever make it better?!? I wonder how I'm going to look at this innocent unborn baby & not remember that the 1st time I heard its heartbeat, my WH was picking up a whore. There's just no words...

cricketinturmoil posted 12/5/2013 16:38 PM

I'm not going to try and give you advice as I just started this nightmare journey yesterday but I can empathize in that I too am pregnant and I don't know any specifics of when/how many/why yet. Just take care of yourself now and be gentle with your heart.

annb posted 12/5/2013 16:46 PM

One of the MANY requirements for your husband to push forward would be counseling...he has a serious problem that needs addressing.

So sorry you are going through this hell while pregnant.

Remorseful is good, but actions speak louder than words.

Personally, I would not begin MC until he deals with his issues.

I hope both of you got tested for STDS.


Lostandpregnant posted 12/5/2013 16:55 PM

I'm so sorry :(
Pregnant here, too.

whichwaysup posted 12/5/2013 17:51 PM

We are both awaiting the results of std tests. Oddly enough I'm alittle calm about that b/c I found his condoms in his office.

To Lostandpregnant, I wanted to thank you especially b/c it was reading your posts that gave me the courage to join this site & share my own hell. I feel like this happening while we're pregnant is a cruel joke. First, if we are pregnant then they were obviously getting sex (while my WS was drunk he had the nerve to say "a man has needs" wtf?!?). 2nd, I'm not sure about you but I do not feel beautiful & glowing at a time when I really need to. & the bigger I get the worse I feel. However, in some way I feel like my pregnancy is saving me from acting on emotion & doing the things I probably would have done to cope. It's a crazy twist of fate

Lostandpregnant posted 12/5/2013 18:18 PM

Oh wow..thank you. I'm really glad you felt like you could be here, it is truly a saving grace.
I feel the same way being pregnant and cheated on/ about a smash to the self esteem when we are at the very most vulnerable.

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