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Newest Member: Zhendeda (61773)

User Topic: One Year Later
♀ 38284
Member # 38284
Default  Posted: 1:12 PM, December 6th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't hang around here very often any more. But we are one year out from when his EA began. The next month is going to be hard for both of us and we've both realized it and are talking it out.
But compared to where we were a year ago....its a miracle. Some days are bad. I am starting a new job and will be attending training in the town where the ONS occurred the same week it occurred. But he's going to try to go with me so we can get through this together.
Our trust isn't 100% and I'm not naive enough to believe it ever will be. Some days I don't trust myself 100%. I've had thought of an RA but know in my heart it would be not only a betrayal of our R but also a betrayal to myself.
We've been through hell this year and are coming through it stronger than ever. He's becoming a genuine person...not the one full of selfishness, self-doubt and lies. I'm learning to speak my mind and open up to him.
I know I'm strong enough to walk away at any point, but hope I do not ever need to.
I know our R isn't through yet but we are making it.

Me (35)
fWH (35)- emotional affair that ended after a ONS (1-24-13)
4 kids
"Ah yes, the past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it or learn from it."
-The Lion King

Posts: 84 | Registered: Jan 2013
♀ 37575
Member # 37575
Default  Posted: 5:25 PM, December 6th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good for you! It's good to reflect after a year and I am so happy you see progress!
You words are very encouraging, thanks for sharing! I hope you continue to grow strong, together!
Take care

Me: BW Him: FWH in our 50's
DDay June 1st 2012
cheated with prostitutes overseas

Posts: 700 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Out West
♀ 38162
Member # 38162
Default  Posted: 6:28 PM, December 6th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi, MUFan! I remember your situation was a bit like mine with an H with KISA tendencies and a needy OW gaining sympathy for her failed relationship.

I'm so pleased to hear that you're doing well! My 1 year mark is coming up too and I am proud of how H and I have grown more vulnerable and open to each other.

Very best of luck in your new job and feel free to post on/around your d-day for support from those of us who are on this rough road, too!

Married 14 years, three amazing kids
H had 17 month EA/PA
D-day 1/5/13

Posts: 787 | Registered: Jan 2013
Topic Posts: 3

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