I'm 10 months out and trying to R. My husband has been doing all the right things, finally being the husband I always wanted, but it's just not enough! Everything is a trigger and I'm so up and down everyday that it's emotionally and physically exhausting. We have been in MC since dday and last night during counseling I just lost it crying and yelling at him that I would never have done this to our family, how could you (this question has been asked about 300) in 10 months with no answer.
I want to feel better and move forward but just can't.... I'm hating Christmas this year, all I keep thinking about is he had an fnnnn girlfriend the past 3 Christmas's! The past 3 1/2 has been a lie! Pictures taken during that time triggers me, our vacations, holidays, weddings, anything we did was a lie! How do you forgive the one person in this world that you loved the most, trusted the most, felt 100% safe with someone that has just taken a knife to your heart. His face is the biggest trigger and just keeps the fnife deep in my heart.
Will I ever look at him again and not think of what he's done to me and our family?