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Newest Member: Ganon27

Just Found Out :
no signs of it getting better

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 littlefoggy (original poster member #41429) posted at 1:34 AM on Wednesday, December 11th, 2013

My righteous WH has no idea. He thinks that just because penis didn't enter vagina he didn't cheat.

He did lie.

He did put her before me.

He did neglect our marriage for his relationship with her.

All of which he admits.

I have been going through Hell for a month and he is wallowing in self pity and blaming me for all his sorrows.

Last night he broke NC (lasted 5 days). His response. "So, what?"

Fucking done with him. So, talk to my lawyer.

Me: BW 30
WH 37
DDay 11/12/13
Divorcing

posts: 505   ·   registered: Nov. 23rd, 2013
id 6592921
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Blameitontherain ( member #37476) posted at 2:20 AM on Wednesday, December 11th, 2013

(((Little foggy)))

You are very strong woman. Others can only treat you as badly as you let them. You are sending a clear signal about what is unacceptable and the consequence. If I knew how to add clapping hands, I would. Stay strong lady!

posts: 273   ·   registered: Nov. 13th, 2012
id 6592967
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ThoughtIKnewYa ( member #18449) posted at 2:26 AM on Wednesday, December 11th, 2013

(((littlefoggy)))

posts: 12227   ·   registered: Mar. 3rd, 2008
id 6592975
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Broken1Again ( member #32211) posted at 6:10 AM on Wednesday, December 11th, 2013

Oh my...you need to kick his ass to the curb pronto. Who does he think he is?? All I can say is seriously count your blessings, give thanks to God that he is no longer your problem. He is now her problem. Wish her good luck too as you send him packing because I promise you he will do her what he's doing to you. Jokes on her. She thinks he's a prince and a prize. You know the truth.

WS and I together 31 years.

Two kids 26/23

posts: 1080   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2011
id 6593152
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Daddo ( member #4504) posted at 6:19 AM on Wednesday, December 11th, 2013

You got to be firm. You should also take a long hard look at the 180 rules - http://www.survivinginfidelity.com/faq_bs.asp#FAQ11

Simply and unemotionally tell him your are talking to a lawyer. No anger, no drama, no begging, no tears . . . just a statement of fact.

You have to break through his armor of denial - by showing him that you are strong enough to move on - without him. Even if you don't feel that way - that is what you need to project.

It's just so sad
But I'm moving on feeling better

posts: 2540   ·   registered: May. 29th, 2004   ·   location: Cupertino, CA
id 6593158
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 littlefoggy (original poster member #41429) posted at 6:16 PM on Wednesday, December 11th, 2013

He is moving out.

Either into the firehouse as a live in or to the OWs and her family.

But it isn't an affair.

Me: BW 30
WH 37
DDay 11/12/13
Divorcing

posts: 505   ·   registered: Nov. 23rd, 2013
id 6593752
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KittenLittle ( new member #41599) posted at 6:44 PM on Wednesday, December 11th, 2013

This sounds like my story. I need to take a page from your book and get a backbone and some strength! Good for you sister!

Me: BS 40's
Him: WS 40's

posts: 30   ·   registered: Dec. 10th, 2013
id 6593802
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 littlefoggy (original poster member #41429) posted at 2:08 AM on Thursday, December 12th, 2013

Icing on the cake:

I went to go to my single session with our marriage counselor (the one WH insisted upon and the one he is convinced I wouldn't go to).

I come stop by home for a minute from work but before my appointment and WH is walking out. I remind him that he needs to watch our child while I am at counseling. He says "can't" and "I am not your babysitter".

No. You are the FATHER. He left and I scrambled to find a babysitter. Still made it to counseling.

Me: BW 30
WH 37
DDay 11/12/13
Divorcing

posts: 505   ·   registered: Nov. 23rd, 2013
id 6594388
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AlexFL ( member #40966) posted at 4:39 AM on Thursday, December 12th, 2013

He is a liar and an ass.

posts: 146   ·   registered: Oct. 13th, 2013
id 6594537
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AlexFL ( member #40966) posted at 4:39 AM on Thursday, December 12th, 2013

He is a liar and an ass.

posts: 146   ·   registered: Oct. 13th, 2013
id 6594538
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