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So about an hour ago he received a call. The call wasn't attached to a name. It just said 'north Carolina'. I asked him who it was and he told me it was probably a wrong number. He put it on speaker and it rang. Eventually it went to a recording saying that the person had not opened a voice mail. I believed him that it was a wrong number because he gets phone calls from people asking someone he does not know.

So a little while later another number calls. This time it was from a number from Massachusetts. The OW is from there. He took the phone and rejected the call. I asked him who it was and he said it was the same number from a few minutes ago. He did not know I saw the number before he grabbed the phone. I told him I know he is lying and asked him who it was again and asked it it was her. He said he does not know if it was her or not as he does not know her number by heart. I asked him to call the number back on speaker like he did when the other number called a few minutes ago and he refused. He said if it is her, he does not want to talk to her.

After about an hour passed he could tell something was wrong and asked me what's the matter. I told him that I don't care if she called you or not. It's the fact that he lied about it when I asked him. He then tells me that he lied because he did not want a fight about it again and that he is tired of all of the distrust....

I don't know what to think.

Be cautious.

he lied because he's tired of all the distrust??????

Really???

Stay stealth, hun.

I'm pretty sure I'd have to get to,the bottom of that phone call.

I just went through his phone while he was sleeping and he deleted the call from the log...

He then tells me that he lied because he did not want a fight about it again and that he is tired of all of the distrust....

Too freaking bad that he is LYING. A man tells the truth and faces up to things.

He's tired of the distrust??? Seems like he earned the distrust.

I read a couple of your other posts. My alarm bells and whistles are going off.

As Starfish said, be cautious.

In my experience, deleting a call from the log is a very, very bad thing. Like, an admission of guilt.

((worthless))

He does not know her number by heart?! Right. Just like my H wasn't sure what the password to his Gmail account was. You know, the one where he saved all his texts from OW. Why do they have to lie like that?

(((90Worthless90)))

He then tells me that he lied because he did not want a fight about it again

Ask him how that worked out for him?

I don't believe he doesn't know her number by heart if he didn't, how did he know it was her when she called. The fact that he deleted makes me think he doesn't want u having access to it. Be on alert...

tired of all of the distrust....

Um, so he just UNproved his trustworthiness by not doing the call-back exercise.

I'm so sorry 90W. There's no way he's not full of it. I wish he could get that covering his ass instead of being honest is a one-way-ticket to this getting worse. Sending hugs.

That is awful! He is lying and turning it around on you.

I'm sorry. I know it's maddening.

Hugs.

Lots of red flags flying on this one. I am sorry but do not let this go. He was trying to cover his ass, so that means he has something to hide. My WH#2 pulled the same BS right before DDay#3. I dug and he finally admitted she had texted him and then he tried to call her back 3 times late one night to tell her to leave us the hell alone. She never answered and he didn't text her or try to contact her again. It is just so infuriating that they try to turn this around and complain about our lack of trust. Just keep your eyes open. (((HUGS)))

This one stinks. I'm very sorry.

o yesterday I started questioning the phone call. I eventually demanded to see his phone and he refused. I then remembered that I had access to his phone account. He does not know I have access to it. I logged in and saw a number from 413 area code in the text messages from yesterday. I grabbed his phone from him and looked through the phone and didn't see any texts from the number and I accused him of deleting them which angrily denied.

I look at the account again and realize that I was looking at the records from several days ago and that the number was from one of his friends from Puerto Rico.... I looked through his phone account and for the past few months all of his calls are to and from his family in Puerto Rico, his brother in P.A, me, and his job... No calls/texts from or to that number. chat includes text messages...

Now I feel bad and I also made myself look dumb

OMG!!!! My Husband deleted every damn call! He has an I phone so my youngest son told me how to go back and get the number ... I then called it myself ... got no answer so I texted it pretending to be my WS and BINGO! I then texted her from my phone telling her there would be no more contact and that me and my two boys would be happy to come over and talk to her husband!

You didn't make yourself look dumb, he made himself look suspicious for refusing to give you his phone and deleting shit. For all you know he was using a calling app that doesn't register on the phone records.

If he wasn't hiding anything he wouldn't be so pissed off and unwilling to share.

Do those exist? I have full access to his phone. When I looked through his phone while he was sleeping, I searched pretty thoroughly. I searched all of his apps. Messages and phone logs. I also checked the history on his browser. Nothing. He also isn't very tech savvy. I don't think he would have thought to use an app like that. I don't think he even knows how to buy apps.

For now, it looks like my suspicions were wrong. But I will definitely keep an eye out.

Yes there are apps that let you have private texts and there are also apps that you can hide pictures, texts and emails in. I searched through my WHs old phone and uncovered an app that looks like its an "audio manager" app when in reality it's used to hide pictures, videos and anything else you don't want others to see. The "audio manager" was just a fake name so it wouldn't look suspicious. Look for something like that.

I just went through his phone while he was sleeping and he deleted the call from the log...

That alone is all the proof you need. It was from her or he would not have deleted it. If it was from someone else there would have been no need.