((Ceejay)) You really don't have to decide anything right now, not today, not in the next two weeks, not even next month. Be patient, kind and sensitive with yourself.
Focus on the kids, focus on getting food and water down your throat. She may say she wants to work on the M but you'd need to wait and see what her actions are anyway to know what your real choices are.
What she has done already may be a dealbreaker but you don't have to know that today. Today, you have to read the 180 (Healing Library, BS FAQ #11). Today you have to take care of you!