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Newest Member: sccssx

New Beginnings :
Hello, I'm your new neighbor.

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 lostandhopless (original poster member #41568) posted at 6:22 PM on Friday, December 13th, 2013

Just saying hello. figured it was time to stop dwelling on the past, recent or otherwise. I may have moved here to quickly but I control myself, not my stbxww. I will not let her have that kind of control any longer.

I am sad to see my old wife, I mean life go, but looking forward to the new one. Why wouldn't I?? I am a much better, stronger, confidant, and wiser person, who will make a much better SO for someone who will appreciate me...

So here I am!!!!

Be careful who you trust. Even your shadow will abandon you when it's dark.....

Divorced 6/13/14

posts: 144   ·   registered: Dec. 7th, 2013
id 6596594
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nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 6:28 PM on Friday, December 13th, 2013

Welcome, neighbor! So glad you joined us.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6596604
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better4me ( member #30341) posted at 8:25 PM on Friday, December 13th, 2013

Welcome lostandhopeless. I just read your story. I'm so sorry that you've found yourself here on SI. I too knew pretty quickly that I was going to seek a divorce after discovering my XWH's affair. I knew pretty early on that a new beginning was what I wanted, but I had to continue to mourn my previous life while seeking it.

Please continue to read and post on the other forums too...especially S/D...you're going to be going through a lot of ups and downs in this process. I know I needed to vent and spout off and feel all of my feelings when I was beginning this process, and the support and advice I received there was invaluable.

Keep coming back here too. There are some pretty wonderful people on this forum and they give some pretty awesome support and glimmers of hope!

DDay 11/17/2010 BW:58
Happily remarried!

posts: 4246   ·   registered: Dec. 9th, 2010   ·   location: Missouri
id 6596741
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 lostandhopless (original poster member #41568) posted at 10:29 PM on Friday, December 13th, 2013

thx to everybody here.

As I said I know I need to get over this for my own piece of mind. the last year has been hard because I had a feeling that something was happening and to be away from home for 3 or 4 for months at a time and all you do is think about it is unimaginable torture. But it also gave me space to detach as much as possible.

So I am sure I am making the right choice. Hell I spend most of my time alone away from friend and family any way. I see it as now I can spend my time doing what I want and spend my money on me instead of paying all the bills for a house I was only in a average of 28 days a year. It's ME time now.

Instead of being trapped sitting in a truck all weekend when I have down time I can now actually get out and have fun......YAY!!!!

I don't think I could be where I am at if SI hadn't been here. I haven't posted a whole lot, But I have spent about 20 hours a day reading everything. I am not working right now because of all the other stuff and I can't sleep very well yet because of everything. Seeing how many other people are here that are dealing with it kept me from the pity party.

Be careful who you trust. Even your shadow will abandon you when it's dark.....

Divorced 6/13/14

posts: 144   ·   registered: Dec. 7th, 2013
id 6596906
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Crescita ( member #32616) posted at 10:48 PM on Friday, December 13th, 2013

Welcome to the fold l&h. Rest assured life does indeed get better after this mess.

“Happiness cannot be pursued; it must ensue.” ― Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning

posts: 3640   ·   registered: Jun. 28th, 2011   ·   location: The Valley of the Sun
id 6596925
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IrishLass518 ( member #34373) posted at 5:40 PM on Saturday, December 14th, 2013

Howdy neighbor and welcome. This is a great place and you'll find laughter, common suffering and a comradery that is hard to find IRL. Take care of yourself and post often it really does help.

Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

posts: 1858   ·   registered: Jan. 2nd, 2012   ·   location: WA
id 6597754
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