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Newest Member: Herself (45715)

User Topic: another first out of the way
PhoenixRising88
♀ 35214
Member # 35214
Default  Posted: 10:37 PM, December 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just got home from my first attendance to an event as a single. My company Christmas party. It wasn't awesome but it didn't Hurt as much as I thought it might. So cross that off list of uncomfortable crap I get to do by myself...


Me: BS (43)Him: EX, aka "The Dink"(50)
D-Day#1 12/22/11. D-Day#2 5/23/2013.

Divorce final 2/10/14.

Throw me to the wolves and I'll return leading the pack.


Posts: 434 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: North Texas
caregiver9000
♀ 28622
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 10:40 PM, December 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((hugs))

cross it off the list. It gets easier. I went to the 3rd staff party as a "single."

I didn't have to pay for a plus one.
I got to visit with my friends without worrying about my spouse "fitting in."
No one embarrassed me (but me)...
I can leave whenever I am ready.


Not so bad, all in all!


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5906 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
Softcentre
39166
Member # 39166
Default  Posted: 1:24 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well done

Did your WS do the sulky, quiet no-one knows me thing? (or later the loud flirty disrespectful thing... ) Mine did and it sapped the enjoyment out of things like that. Embrace that you only have to look after you!


Me: BW
Him: STBXWH 'The Arse' - passive aggressive, tt'ing, gaslighting...multiple EA's with different women (1 'proven') and at least 1 PA

Took a while, but I like the me I am, without him.

"Until God opens the next do


Posts: 1097 | Registered: May 2013 | From: UK
RedWheelBarrow
♀ 38966
Member # 38966
Default  Posted: 2:19 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My WH always turned up the charm *and* volume at parties. A pathetic attention whore. One thing I love since he left is being able to just be me, authentic me, with friends. The truth is his behavior always freaked me out.
Leaving when you want to leave is also a great bonus of being solo at parties.


Me: BW 50
Him:"Rockstar" late 50's
DS: 11
Married 14 years, together 17 years
DDay #1 Nov.2012, plus more, more, more!
OW : 25 years younger than him, left her BH for my prize beast.
He moved in with her April,2013.
Divorced!

Posts: 138 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: NW
Williesmom
♀ 22870
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 4:48 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Mine is tonight. I was a challenge to the person in charge of seating because I'm a single. So, I'll be sitting with our international employees, who are all single and extremely fun.


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7814 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
suckstobeme
♀ 30853
Member # 30853
Default  Posted: 5:52 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good for you!

It does get a lot better. I remember my first work party as a single. I felt so uncomfortable, I went with another couple just so I wouldn't walk in alone. It was ok during the event, but I remember crying the whole way home.

The next year was much better and this year even better than that. These are my friends and people who support me. When I walk in, they say hi, hand me a drink and welcome me into their conversations.

Now I feel like anyone else who I choose to bring with me in the future better hold up and be good enough for me and my friends and co workers.


BW - me
ExWH - "that one"
D - 2011
You get what you put in, and people get what they deserve.
Hard as it may be, try to never give the OP any of your power or head space.

Posts: 2879 | Registered: Jan 2011
PurpleBirch
♀ 39170
Member # 39170
Default  Posted: 7:41 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My first work Christmas party is on Thursday. I like most of the other teachers, so I think I'll be ok. Most of them will have their spouses though, so I'm not sure how I'll be feeling about that in the end.

WH never really liked going out to parties, so at least I won't have to worry about "is he feeling left out, etc.". Or worse, if I happen to talk to any of the male teachers (who, I'm sorry, are not the least bit attractive), will WH think I'm showing too much interest in them.


Me: BS (32)
Him: WH (31)
Married 3 years.
Confessed to PA April 21 2013.

DS (6), DS (18 months)

Aug 30 2013 He gives me back his ring with an ultimatum: "Get over it or get out".

Status: Done like dinner


Posts: 277 | Registered: May 2013 | From: The frozen North, eh?
PhoenixRising88
♀ 35214
Member # 35214
Default  Posted: 7:57 PM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for the responses.... It was just really awkward feeling. The first event like this in ten years that I went to by myself....

Although now that I think about it, STBX started showing his backside by quitting coming to any of my family's get-togethers about four years ago...

So...actually I've BEEN going to events by myself, up until last night they were all just family events and last night was a corporate event.

I can tell you this - my family (and friends) have been the ROCK STARS of my world through all this. I have no interest in even attempting to date anytime soon. But if and when I finally am ready to, one of the things I will not compromise on will be the guy has to be into family. Never again will I be involved with someone who tries subtly or not-to-subtly to have me all to themselves and discourages time with my family.


Me: BS (43)Him: EX, aka "The Dink"(50)
D-Day#1 12/22/11. D-Day#2 5/23/2013.

Divorce final 2/10/14.

Throw me to the wolves and I'll return leading the pack.


Posts: 434 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: North Texas
Topic Posts: 8

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