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mrcpu (original poster member #38157) posted at 4:55 AM on Saturday, December 14th, 2013
Sometimes I miss the OM. He and I were BFF's for 30 years until he broke the bro-code and had an A with my WW.
The other night I had a dream that my WW and I were renewing our vows and he showed up (he was my Best Man at both my weddings and I was at his).
In my dream my parents (who know nothing about the A) were happy to see him. I asked him to come speak to me outside in the hallway of the banquet centre, at which point I told him to GTFO and he left. When I went back in there were a lot of eyebrows raised as to why he had showed up and left again.
Anyway, I woke up after that and had a lot of trouble getting back to sleep.
Double Betrayal really sucks.
D-Day 1: 22 Dec 2012 - Confirmed WW was having an affair with my xBFF
D-Day 2: 22 July 2014 - Caught WW working on a hookup online with local real estate agent.
D-Day 3: 18 Dec 2014 - Caught WW Breaking NC with my xBFF for past 2 months via text.
Crushed1 ( member #6449) posted at 7:05 AM on Saturday, December 14th, 2013
I knew the mow but we were acquaintances and it hurt me very deeply, so I can imagine the pain you're in having known your fBFF for 30 years and I'm sure it hurts on so many levels to try and overcome. I've had many disturbing dreams about the mow over the years. It's your subconscious trying to work things out in your mind. (((mrcpu)))
~~"You can't run away from yourself"!!! Me to my H when he descended into adultery insanity.
~~Prov.15:13 "By sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken"
~~"The day breaks-your mind aches"
~STRENGTH~PEACE~HOPE~FAITH
IrishLass518 ( member #34373) posted at 8:32 AM on Saturday, December 14th, 2013
The OWifetress had been my friend for several years. Then she decided that she wanted my life. Double betrayal is really awful. I don't know that I could ever trust anyone again. Every time I talk to someone I find myself wondering if they will betray me down the line. Will it be one of my kids, someone from work, the former neighbor I ran into at the store? It really does put you on edge about other people.
Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"
Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 9:04 AM on Saturday, December 14th, 2013
"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom
sodamnlost ( member #37190) posted at 11:54 AM on Saturday, December 14th, 2013
I can't imagine a double betrayal. Watching my BFF deal with TWO double betrayals is soul crushing. While the dream disturbed you - in a way it was empowering. You had him leave. You took control. Have you spoke to him since you found out? Just curious if this is an outcome you didn't get (confronting and walking away feeling taller) or if you didn't and your subconscious needed it? Either way - hoping things get better.
Me - BS original Dday 10-2012, separated June 2014, divorce Fall 2016
Grief, loss and pain taunt her - "you will never be the same." Like a Phoenix rising from the ashes, she rises and spreads her new wings as she brushes off the ashes an
lordhasaplan? ( member #30079) posted at 4:42 PM on Saturday, December 14th, 2013
In your dream you should have throat punched him.
BS- Me (45)D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10). Currently in R.Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.
mrcpu (original poster member #38157) posted at 9:51 PM on Saturday, December 14th, 2013
Lol. Thanks for the throat punch comment, that made me laugh.
I'm embarrassed to say I have talked to him since d-day. First we met up and hashed it out in his car. A lot of him crying and apologizing. Then I did something really stupid. I tried going out with him a couple of times. We even all went out with our kids to an event. WTF was I thinking?!?! Anyway, I sent him a long email telling him that I couldn't see him around anymore. He replied that he would respect my wishes and so far I have seen compliance for NC between him and my ww and I haven't reeally spoke to him.
I have seen him a few times during the summer because he is/was dating my neighbor and would come over. The last time I saw him in a bar in town I ignored him but he said goodbye to me on the way out.
Sometimes I feel sorry for him. He obviously was screwed up by his divorce and started to covet my wife and my "perfect family".
I once considered sleeping with his wife to get revenge but there isn't enough beer in the world!!!!
and besides I had a lot of crazy stupid thoughts but worked through them all.
D-Day 1: 22 Dec 2012 - Confirmed WW was having an affair with my xBFF
D-Day 2: 22 July 2014 - Caught WW working on a hookup online with local real estate agent.
D-Day 3: 18 Dec 2014 - Caught WW Breaking NC with my xBFF for past 2 months via text.
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