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Topic: How to respond?

Lex71
♂ 41172
Member # 41172

Posted: 5:09 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013

I have short conversations with Wgf via text. Usually this is about the children and that's about it. Sometimes she will send something like 'I love you'. I find this really uncomfortable. I don't respond but I still feel bad.

Does any one else's WS/Wbf/Wgf do this??

Why?!

Me: 42 Her: xWGf 39
Not married only engaged.
Two great kids, both under 6
DDay #1: 18 Nov 2013
DDay #2: July 2011

Posts: 88 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: UK

curiouswiz
♀ 34405
Member # 34405

Posted: 5:18 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013

My stbxh did it yesterday...??? Huh? Instead of good bye he said I love you and hung up. Okay. Alrighty then. Of course you do. That love just fills me to the brim. I know he loves me so much that he lives with a heroin junky half our age.

Okay, I love you...first time I've heard that in years.

God bless us, everyone.

Posts: 633 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Boston

jb3199
♂ 27673
Member # 27673

Posted: 5:56 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013

Does any one else's WS/Wbf/Wgf do this??
Why?!

It is simply done to ease their own conscience. To help *prove* to themselves that they are not bad people.

And it is utter bullshit. Not saying that she doesn't love you, but the reason that she is saying it to you is for her peace of mind....not yours.

Sorry, friend.

[This message edited by jb3199 at 5:56 AM, December 14th (Saturday)]

BH-47
WW-44
2 boys-17 & 20(special needs)
Married 22yrs.(together 27yrs.)

All work and no play has just cost me my wife--Gary Puckett
D-Day: 9/18/09 D-Day#2: 2/19/10 The Marriage Killer: 6/6/11
Heading for D

Posts: 2213 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: northeast

stillprettyupset
♂ 41286
Member # 41286

Posted: 6:44 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013

I fought this mental battle with myself yesterday. I didn't respond at first either. Then, I thought about it. I do still love her despite all the horseshit and the pain she caused. So, I replied back "love you too.". It doesn't change my course of action so who cares. I don't hate her and I still have those feelings (always will) even if we divorce. So, worst case...I gave her the same confounded split answer she gives me and threw her brain into mass confusion. Best case, I am sharing my emotions and it may lead to a better relationship. Meh.

Me: 42
WW: 36
Latest D-day: Sept 2013
Reconciling? Limbo?

Posts: 96 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: NE Ohio

nomistakeaboutit
♂ 36857
Member # 36857

Posted: 6:44 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013

Sorry, friend,

I wouldn't read anything into it other than her having temporary pangs of guilt for treating you so poorly.

I read your profile. If you XWgf does love you, she has a very odd way of showing her love. Based on what she had to say about you when she didn't know you were listening (reading), she very clearly does not respect or appreciate you.

...hope you help those young kids have a fun Christmas Holiday!

Me: BH 58.........Her: WW 45
DD: 8..........DS: 5
Married for six years.
DDay: 12-25-11 Divorced: 7-15-12
...................................
"It's like a nightmare within a nightmare, which in and of itself is a nightmare!"

Posts: 1018 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: U.S.A.

steadfast1973
♀ 24719
Member # 24719

Posted: 7:00 AM, December 14th (Saturday), 2013

She's a selfish bitch, who's been using you. He mouth may say I love you, but her actions don't.

Me- 40- BS Him- 36- WH D-day#1 5/25/09 3 mo. EA d-day#2 11/06/13 Prostitute 11/5/13 in R
"I've seen your flag on the marble arch, our love is not a victory march, it's a cold and broken hallelujah."- Leonard Cohen

Posts: 2286 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Midwest

Topic Posts: 6

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