And what did WS do? He changed all his passwords in retaliation. So much for transparency. So much for just the slightest understanding of feelings boiling over (NOT excusing what I did, but it's at least understandable). And its because he doesn't show empathy that my feelings sometimes boil over and have nowhere to go, except to excruciating pain, or in this case, to FB. Dumb.
Anyway, all this on General forum, and I've been terribly needy all day...
The POINT of this post:
I don't know an attorney or even anyone who has been divorced, who is a good friend, to ask for a referral. My only experience with an attorney was a really bad one, she did nothing and already i had a bill for $10K. We settled in Mediation.
I am feeling REALLY vulnerable and afraid to hire an attorney. I'm thinking of seeing if Domestic Violence folks can recommend an attorney who might have an actual interest in women's issues. I'm not involved in DV, unless you count what is actually a sort of emotional abuse, which i have admittedly grown to accept (but which I'm now working to get out of).
We own a house together. He's paid maybe 20%. I want to try to protect what's mine.
Or maybe I should just let him keep 50% and dump it, happy to be free of his toxicity forever.
Advice warmly appreciated!
Sorry for everyone's struggles. I realize my situation pales in comparison.
[This message edited by TheAgonyOfIt at 11:56 PM, December 15th (Sunday)]
Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling
I made the mistake of settling for a substandard attorney, I still got what I wanted in the end because what I wanted was the law. It just cost me a lot of extra stress fighting with my attorney and xpos.
Your WS' behavior doesn't suggest R, he should be far more concerned with you and your pain than OW and her BS. I am sorry you find yourself here.
"I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel". –Maya Angelou
Your WS is clearly not being remorseful. Changing his passwords? What is he hiding?
So you tagged OW. So what? I tagged every singe one of OW's FB pictures with the word HOMEWRECKER. I don't even feel bad about it. You shouldn't either.
Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.
Yep, he's a dick. I realize that it's just all about him. If i act normal, he's fine. But if I ask for anything, and forget about anything emotional, he's an ass.
Just an immature, self-absorbed guy. Low self esteem, blah blah blah. Probably not the devil as he appears to be sometimes when i'm in emotional hell, but just a selfish dickhead.