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I'm posting in this forum for the first time - usually on the reconciliation forum - so something different. I just feel frustrated that my wh is seemingly loved by everyone - who have no idea what he has done to me, or his reputation. Those that do know are quite wary or at least worried and not taken in by his charms, but it is sooo frustrating to watch him in action. Dday was last spring, and EA lasted two years. Because he finally admitted the womanizing was wrong I am giving him a chance and he is in IC. He is so subtle and uses the "nice guy" or "damsel in distress" tactics to empathize his way into people's good graces. Meanwhile, I have been carrying my own weight in terms of working hard in the relationship etc, knocking myself out, and people don't see me through that same lens because I am quiet and conscientious. Anyone else have these types of frustrations?

Yes,
Everyone says what a wonderful, person, man etc WH is. I must have started giving off a certain vibe and flat out told some people he was full of you know what. I felt like I was lieing every time someone would say these things and I just sat there silent. I started standing up for myslef. WH would take credit for things I do with the kids and I finallyy just let them know who was doing all of those things and it wasn't WH. He painted a very negative picture of me and now people are seeing me for who I am and are looking at him funny. I would just say find ways to let your light shine and remeber how wonderful you really are.

I hear ya on this one. My ws coaches, all the kids and parents love him and especially the moms tell me how lucky I am :barf
He acts so different in public. He can be a total dick at home but as soon as we pull up to the field, he puts on his game face. I know people think I'm a bitch because I'm usually upset when we arrive and keep to myself. He's that cool funny guy with the uptight wife. Poor guy.... :