There is some over the counter stuff called "Calm"
I hear it's like a supplement. My mom wants me to get it:) I am not a medication taker and HATE feeling drugged. I know three people that took it during their D and said it's great.
I was a social smoker but didn't really smoke much independently, well NOW I fucking do. UGH! So I meel ya. Working on Me is my new years resolution, that included my selfesteem, health, being a mom, quitting smoking, etc.
In regards to how to calm down, I blast music in my ears and close my eyes. It's so loud that I can't think about other things. I often feel small anxiety attacks, nothing that I'd flip out for. I just get sudden feelings of being overwhelmed, panicky, and emotional. I go outback, put in the headphones, blast music, and have a smoke. I calm down in minutes. If I'm driving, only the music will do, I will not smoke in a car, gross.