H still has addictions. He is addicted to an online multi player game and porn (he doesn't know I know about the porn). He spends hours everyday IN the game. He texts other members of his team (so he says) all the time. He uses a texting app to do so, it does not show up on his bill. He watches porn nearly every time he is left alone, at least 5 times a week.
I am tired of wondering who he is texting with, I am tired of wondering why he loves the porn so so so much, I am tired of pretending I am ok with all of it.
But scared to death to open this can of worms. If I bring it all up he will get defensive, that is how he is. What if we can't work it out? What if me telling him just gives him the heads up to hide all his online activity better?
I didn't even want to write this post for fear he might read it but I needed to get this out, especially to some people who umderstand.