Well, hope this is the right forum.
After a year of dealing with wife's EA with COW, with no NC and her dragging me along on her leash, I think I cut it good today. She told me weeks ago she would NC with COW except business, she hasn't and says there hasn't been a good time to do it.
I finally, though insistence, got her to read the latter half of the "discovery" chapter in "not just friends" (chapter 3 I think, don't know because I packed it in the luggage that is now on way with her to her parents for Christmas). I was hoping it would at least explain to her what I was going through and what was needed to fix it. She told me it didn't apply to her. After dealing with all the pain for a year, I take what she said as she isn't going to try.
This was right as we were leaving to go to her parents for Xmas, so I told her to go without me, and she did of course -- totally understandable. But I also told her I was going to talk to her boss Monday, which happens to be my new boss, and explain to her what is going on. That I was done with her, that I just had enough and tired of doing this alone with her telling me that I just need to deal with it. Well, I'm going to deal with it, alone as I have been, so looks like it is a new beginning for me (hope that is what this thread is about?)