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Clarrissa posted 12/21/2013 10:41 AM

Of how much progress I've made in the last 5 years.

Yesterday at work we received our bonus (6% of our gross income ) and at first I was just going to deposit it in the bank, not say anything to my H. You know, a surprise, even though he knew it was coming. But, I told him I got it. So yeah, I told him bonuses were in but it crossed my mind to keep the dollar amount to myself, still a little bit of a surprise. Nope, couldn't keep that to myself either. I told him the exact amount.

I've told him every time before this but what's different about this time was I immediately dismissed the idea of keeping the info from him. I even told myself "Nah, you'll tell him." I never seriously considered NOT telling him.

mindbody posted 12/21/2013 13:10 PM

Congrats Clarrissa, it is progress. You adjusted your thought processes and applied transparency on your own.

I immediately dismissed the idea of keeping the info from him.

Sounds as though it is becoming a habit. I can see the value to complete honesty all the time. The fact that you feel good about

Nope, couldn't keep that to myself either.

demonstrates your healing.

knightsbff posted 12/21/2013 13:21 PM

Yep, sounds like progress to me. Identifying and changing old, unhealthy thought processes. Good for you!

Clarrissa posted 12/21/2013 14:22 PM

I *did* want it to be a surprise and it was to some extent, even to me considering I was off work for a couple months early this year (workers comp injury to my wrist). What I had envisioned was dropping the check in the bank and waiting for H to check the balance (which he does more often lately as finances have been a bit tight) and surprising him that way but as it turned out, I told him the first chance I had once I had check in hand. Another benefit was it eased his mind that we could take care of the bills and still have some "mad money".

KBeguile posted 12/21/2013 19:48 PM

+1

Very nicely done!

lemony.2008 posted 12/21/2013 21:35 PM

Definitely a good example that shows progress!