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General :
We have the power

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 plainpain (original poster member #40139) posted at 4:34 PM on Monday, December 23rd, 2013

I realized this morning that, although people do have the power to completely devastate our lives, we also really do have the power to impact other people's lives for the good.

My daughter bought a cup of coffee for a woman who works at her school; she told me that the woman always looks sad and a little 'rough'. She bought her a coffee and thanked her for all she did.. she said the woman just about broke into sobs. Such a little thing - but somebody saw her.

One of the hardest things about this whole A thing, is the feelings of invisibility. What has been helping me lately is to try to stop thinking about my own self and sorrow, and how invisible I feel/felt, and to start noticing the other Invisibles around me. It actually really helps.

I feel like I have been given a super-power. I have the power to SEE now, things I couldn't see before. I see broken hearted people. Trying to find ways to use my powers for good is turning out to be very great therapy for me. My H's affair does not define me. I am MORE than what he did.

Me: Believer, 40s
Him: Liar, 40s
Married 19 years
1 year EA/2 month PA/incidental infidelities I can't begin to process
OC born 2014
OW:21
In successful R. It only hurts now when it rains.

posts: 875   ·   registered: Jul. 31st, 2013
id 6609242
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StillLivin ( member #40229) posted at 4:47 PM on Monday, December 23rd, 2013

I know EXACTLY what you mean.

I've had several experiences where just "seeing" others and random acts of kindness have "shown" me the power we have too.

Thank you for that uplifting post!

Merry Christmas!

"Bitch please a good man can't be stolen." ROFLMAO - SBB: 7/2/2014

posts: 6244   ·   registered: Aug. 8th, 2013   ·   location: AZ
id 6609261
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headdesk ( member #40787) posted at 6:35 PM on Monday, December 23rd, 2013

Random acts of kindness are something I love to do and have done for years. It's a quick trip out of your pain - you can instead look at someone else's and take some of the bite out of theirs. It's pretty affirming and it makes a huge impact for people.

Me: 39
WH: 42
DDay:Sep 19 2013 (only TT of EA)
Oct 4th 2013 revealed PA through snooping.
Marred 16 years, together for 20. Looking to R at this time. We have awesome kids (12/14).

posts: 273   ·   registered: Sep. 25th, 2013
id 6609401
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Eudaimonia ( member #32445) posted at 6:39 PM on Monday, December 23rd, 2013

Thank you so much for this! I LOVE it!!! I feel the same way.

So long, and thanks for all the fish!

posts: 472   ·   registered: Jun. 10th, 2011
id 6609405
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