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Newest Member: Questiounanswere (45696)

User Topic: 180 guidelines
716dayslost
♂ 11536
Member # 11536
Question  Posted: 9:18 PM, December 24th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am reaching out for some guidelines on the Holidays and general with 180. Tomorrow is Christmas, friends, family will make it tough. I just started it yesterday.
I have the 180 list. I guess I need more specific guidance on how things should go. Of course I was in panic mode and I did all the wrong things up until this point.
I am a long time BH now with the a faithful M for 6 years and now this newest A. D Day was only one week ago. This is my first post on SI since.
Please post so help/advice or what I can read. thank you and bless you all.


You can stand me up at the gates of hell
But I won't back down
In a world that keeps on pushin' me around
But I'll stand my ground and I won't back down

Posts: 1578 | Registered: Aug 2006 | From: New York
Skan
♀ 35812
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 9:48 PM, December 24th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well, here is a quick review: http://survivinginfidelity.com/faq_bs.asp#FAQ11

Vaguely friendly, but distant. Think being polite to someone your parents invited over, who you don't know very well and don't have anything in common with. Non-commential or feeding comments back. "Didn't MIL give DD the best gift ever? - What a nice gift (said with a vague smile)." Friendly, but distant. And make spaces for yourself to get away, when needed. Lie-down for a headache, etc.

Best of luck. Just keep thinking of the time when everyone goes home and you can take care of business. (((hugs)))


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 5069 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
716dayslost
♂ 11536
Member # 11536
Default  Posted: 11:15 PM, December 24th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

thank you. I had the list, it is just applying some of them will be hard.


You can stand me up at the gates of hell
But I won't back down
In a world that keeps on pushin' me around
But I'll stand my ground and I won't back down

Posts: 1578 | Registered: Aug 2006 | From: New York
Locked
♀ 41677
Member # 41677
Default  Posted: 4:50 AM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am one week into trying 180 and have seen a difference in wh

we have separated his choice he left me for his tart I too done all the wrong things it's been just over 3 weeks since dday

When he phoned last he told me he loved me lots repeatedly I just said goodbye speak next week. Felt good to start getting some control back.


Posts: 10 | Registered: Dec 2013
716dayslost
♂ 11536
Member # 11536
Default  Posted: 9:50 AM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks. It has been only since Monday that I am trying this. She is living here until after the first of the year. Then she needs time away "alone?" to sort things out in her head.
I still need advice in implementing this then next few days. Letting friends and family get through Christmas before telling them... I want them to have a Christmas without this.
Please keep the responses coming. thank you


You can stand me up at the gates of hell
But I won't back down
In a world that keeps on pushin' me around
But I'll stand my ground and I won't back down

Posts: 1578 | Registered: Aug 2006 | From: New York
Topic Posts: 5

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