divorced the Dooosh 8/13
When I try to talk to my son10 on the phone he is always very uncomfortable. I know it's cause he feels disloyal to his dad. (We've chatted about it). I don't ever make a big deal about it to 10 because the poor little guy already feels so stuck in the middle as it is.
But why, then, can he chat for 15 minutes on the phone with the Doosh? Is it because I have never tried to make him feel guilty for wanting to talk to his dad? Because I've always encouraged him to call his dad every night?
There are some weekends (most, actually) that I don't talk to my son at all because I know he is going to act weird and uncomfortable.
Tonight I just wanted to say good night. It's Christmas Eve. The first time ever that I have not put out cookies for Santa and left reindeer treats with my son. :( I just wanted to talk to him and I got one word answers, blank pauses, and finally said, "can't talk huh?" To which he affirmed.
I typically leave the room when he calls his dad so he can talk openly without feeling torn.
If I hadn't reached indifference towards the Dooosh I'd really hate his broken ass right now.
It's OKAY to be scared.
Being scared means you're about
to do something really, really brave.