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Newest Member: justnobody (53094)

User Topic: SI and Triggers
♀ 41143
Member # 41143
Default  Posted: 12:30 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

After reading a post in JFO, I am triggering. Hasn't happened in months. Hasn't happened here at all. I hate this feeling! How do you guys deal it? I want to be supportive of others, but this feels awful. The post hit way too close to home. My only solution is to take a nap and hope it goes away.

Me: 40's; XBS Him: 40's; XWS/NPD/SA
D-day 1: 5/2007- A #1; 7/2007 A #1 continued-R
D-day 2: 3/2013 A #2/multi-ONSs; 4/2013 A #2 continues to present
D: 7/2013 (25 yrs together; days shy of 22nd anniversary-GOAL MET!)
Our kids: teen & tween

Posts: 168 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Southern US
♀ 34678
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 12:47 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I take breaks from reading the JFO forum. It triggers me, also, and my dday was 2 years ago!!! Sometimes I will go on and just choose one story, respond to it, and then go back to New Beginnings.

(((making lemonade)))

Keep Calm and Happy On!

me BS 52
him - 46
married 15 years DIVORCED 10 31 12
children - ds15 ds12
d-day 12-19-11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day
Divorce filed

Posts: 3048 | Registered: Jan 2012
♀ 22870
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 12:59 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My brother went through infidelity about a year after my divorce...that was rough. I tried very hard to provide support and advice for him, while also trying not to trigger.

You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 8786 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
♀ 35812
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 3:31 PM, December 25th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

One of the most truthful things said here in SI is to take what you need and leave the rest. If reading in a particular forum triggers you, take a break from it. If you need to walk away for a while, do so. Do what YOU need to do, for yourself. It doesn't make you a bad person or an uncaring person. It just makes you human.

BTW, I completely empathize. I still open certain threads and realize that there is nothing I can contribute because it somehow hits too close to home or triggers something in me. I just close them, try to say a little prayer for the person posting, and trust that one of our on-line friends will have their back. (((hugs)))

Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012

Posts: 6892 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
Topic Posts: 4

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