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Divorce/Separation :
Christmas Vent

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 Must Survive (original poster member #34533) posted at 10:24 PM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

Sooo I am pissed, angry etc.

DS just came down to ask when dinner would be. I said around 6 why. STBXH wants to pick him up sometime around 6. I said 6 would not work. Dinner is between 6-6:30. (I have 8 people and a baby coming) Tough to time it exactly. I said it would be better if they did something before. He said STBXH said it would be better for him after 6. FTG. I told my son that he should plan on at least an 1.5 to 2 hours for dinner. He goes ok, I will tell dad after 8.

So I'm pissy. And I know I shouldn't be. But STBXH is having his Christmas with his new family and wants to dictate what time it works for him to see his son. I hate him. This is the third Christmas since D-day. First Christmas did not see DS or call him. Second Christmas he did not see him or call him. So now the third Christmas he wants to see him.

I want not to care. I want to not have a broken heart. I want someone in my life. Its days like these I feel so alone.

I should be thankful. My dinner consists of my daughters from previous marriage, their dad, his girlfriend, and his girlfriend's daughter. And of course my son and my self and 1 daughter's husband and my new granddaughter. Yep, this is the 2nd year in a row I have spent Christmas with my first X. I know how to do blended families. BUT FTG it will never happen with STBXH because I don't think I will ever get the hate out of my heart.

As a side note I am trying not to upset my DS for wanting to see his father. But my formal dining room looks out to the front of the street. I can just see STBXH drive up and pick up DS and there we are all around the dinner table.

I think I need a drink. I feel so selfish. I hate how I feel, but I can't change it.

Merry Christmas

Me BS
WS: Just a squished bug on the window of my life!
Divorced-Let my new beginning start

They have a choice: they can live in my new world, or they can die in their old one." — Daenerys Targaryen

posts: 1066   ·   registered: Jan. 13th, 2012   ·   location: Must Survive
id 6611618
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nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 10:29 PM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

((((Must Survive))))

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6611620
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pregnantandsad ( member #40141) posted at 10:34 PM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

((Mustsurvive))

Try to enjoy your dinner tonight and your new grand baby!

As soon as DD finished opening her presents this morning she asked when she got to go to her dads :( I tried no to take it personal, she is 4 and was excited for more presents.

M 7 years, together for 12
2 kids- DD5 & DD 1 1/2
D-Day 7/2013 - Divorced!

posts: 160   ·   registered: Aug. 1st, 2013   ·   location: California
id 6611623
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Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 10:57 PM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

((((HUGS))))

I understand being upset on this day. I hope you're better able to maintain your emotions than I have been.

Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU

posts: 10722   ·   registered: Jun. 21st, 2011   ·   location: USA
id 6611630
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Gemini71 ( member #40115) posted at 11:05 PM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

New rule. Don't answer the door during dinner. Let STBXH wait while you enjoy a leisurely dinner. FTG!

DSs 21, 16, 12
About my Ex:
IDK
IDC
IDGAF

Double Betrayal D-Day 7/26/2013
Divorced 11/18/2014

posts: 3406   ·   registered: Jul. 30th, 2013   ·   location: Illinois, USA
id 6611634
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ruby44 ( member #41135) posted at 12:21 AM on Thursday, December 26th, 2013

yay, Gemini,

Love that idea. I remember when I was a child and we never answered the door or the phone during dinner. People understood that concept but we live in a world of instant contact.

Enjoy your dinner MustSurvive! FTG.

Me BW 52, Him WH 48
Married 13 years,
2 DDs (12 and 10)
D-Day Confirmed 10/24/13 suspected before that but did not want to believe it.
WH filed for D 11/12/13
2/8/14 WH asked if he could come home.

posts: 277   ·   registered: Oct. 28th, 2013   ·   location: Midwest
id 6611677
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