and I am so miserable right now...I had DD up until 6pm, when asshat showed up at my parents house to get her. All day long that deadline was looming, and, because of that, at times it didnt feel much like Christmas...
Now I am back at the marital home (aka hell) where asshat and I are doing in-house separation, and it's empty and quiet and it doesnt feel like Christmas because my whole world (DD) is gone with asshat to his psycho mother's house.
All I can think about is how I wont get to have her next year, because it will be asshat's year...and then that turns into panic over the custody battle...and that leads into worrying about going to court (because we WILL end up in court)...and I cant do anything but sit here, alone and miserable, and WORRY about all the crazy unknowns in my life right now...and then I get mad because NONE OF THIS IS MY FAULT!! Asshat chose ALL of this, and I just have to sit here and suffer for the bullshit choices HE made.
And loop that thought process over and over again, and that is my first Christmas night alone EVER.
This shit sucks.
Where's the wine?