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Newest Member: Tigress5455 (45753)

User Topic: An Introduction
GingerAle
♀ 33822
Member # 33822
Default  Posted: 10:18 AM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi Everyone... I have been on SI for a while now, I don't post a lot but am beyond thankful for this amazing place and all of the people here. I honestly don't know what I would do without it.

When I first joined, I believed my WH and I would R, but gave up that notion 2 months ago. Something in me finally snapped and realized this marriage is finished, and if I don't do something to change my life, it will ruin my emotional health. He had an EA in 2010, another one in 2012, and at least one other friendship with a female co-worker that crossed the boundaries. He loves attention from women, and sees himself as quite the KISA. He is also a compulsive liar, and the most self-destructive person I have ever met. It sickens me to think of all the years I've wasted, letting him pull the wool over my eyes. Can't tell you how many times I have heard people tell me "your husband is such a nice man". He is just that good at fooling people.

I have been a SAHM for 24 years, and still have two children at home. But I can do this. It is a bit like 'eating an elephant one bite at a time', but I am not stuck in this marriage and my kids and I will be great! We are still living in the same house with him, (he won't leave), but I have attorney appts, and really am excited about my new life.

Thanks to everyone of you who share your stories, words of wisdom, and support. I hope that I can be helpful to others here as well


My WH (The KISA, NPD) 6 month EA in 2010
2 other EAs in 2012 & 2013
Filed for D 7/2014


Posts: 428 | Registered: Nov 2011
devistatedmom
♀ 24961
Member # 24961
Default  Posted: 10:50 AM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hey GingerAle. I'm sorry you have go this route, but you sound like you have your head on straight. After 24 years of being SAH, I'm sure you should be getting some kind of Alimony. See those lawyers, figure out your options, and see what the new year has in store for you!!


BS(me) 46, Two wonderful teens.
He is no longer my best friend. Repeat until it sticks.

WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.


Posts: 5588 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Canada
Lola7
♀ 41195
Member # 41195
Default  Posted: 11:03 AM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Mine was great at fooling people too. He's Mr. Nice Guy; will offer to shovel your driveway, loan you money, just a fine upstanding family man.

Except for the part where he tries to fuck your wife. That's kind of a bummer.

I'm sorry you're here, but you will get tons of support. ((GingerAle)) Keep posting and reaching out.

[This message edited by Lola7 at 11:03 AM, December 26th (Thursday)]


caelitus mihi vires
"My strength is from heaven"
DIVORCED!

Posts: 211 | Registered: Nov 2013
dmari
♀ 37215
Member # 37215
Default  Posted: 12:59 PM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi and welcome! So glad you've decided to post here. Sounds like you are in a good place emotionally. Take care!


Me (BS): 43 Children: DD 19, DS 15
Divorced September 30, 2014
"It's always darkest before the dawn ..."

Posts: 2303 | Registered: Oct 2012
shiloe
♀ 1224
Member # 1224
Default  Posted: 1:01 PM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Except for the part where he tries to fuck your wife. That's kind of a bummer.


But remember, good love is hard to find . . -Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
BS - 54
Cheater -54
Married 26 yrs
DD - 21 DD -19 DS-17
A#1 2000 with married ho-worker/neighbor ow#1
A#2 2007-? OW#2 LTA with yet another married ho-worker. Kicked h

Posts: 633 | Registered: Mar 2003
GingerAle
♀ 33822
Member # 33822
Default  Posted: 4:15 PM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for the welcome! I do feel good emotionally, last week I was pretty down though. But then he goes and does something that reminds me of why I have to get out of this. He's very good about that


My WH (The KISA, NPD) 6 month EA in 2010
2 other EAs in 2012 & 2013
Filed for D 7/2014


Posts: 428 | Registered: Nov 2011
sparkysable
♀ 3703
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 4:18 PM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It's an emotional roller coaster, so be ready. Some days, you feel great, other days, not so much.


D-day OW#1 2/2004; R for 6 years; D-day OW#2 5/2010

Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.


Posts: 3493 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
hopeandchange
♂ 33287
Member # 33287
Default  Posted: 4:56 PM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good luck. Sharing a home with my WW while searching for a new home and negotiating the D has been really hard. And your situation sounds worse. Good luck!

H&C


BH (me, 50)
WS (her, 48)
Divorced!
3 wonderful teens
Heading for Happiness

Posts: 408 | Registered: Sep 2011
badmedicine
♀ 41692
Member # 41692
Default  Posted: 10:44 PM, December 26th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hello and welcome GingerAle.

Glad you are here and posting. It can be a huge help and it also feels good to respond to others.

I'm on the bandwagon with the "Your husband is sooo nice. He is always smiling" (well, that's because he is screwing someone else...bastard). I have felt like the bad person already and I didn't even know how much of the bad person he was. Good luck in the coming days with legal matters; with kids and unequal earning it is probably going to be a struggle. I hope you can surround yourself with people IRL and here that can help.


"The wishbone will never replace the backbone." -Will Henry
"This wasn't just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it." -Dorothy Parker

Posts: 208 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: United States
Topic Posts: 9

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