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LostSamurai (original poster member #41347) posted at 7:25 PM on Thursday, December 26th, 2013
All of a sudden, my wife texts me and say's I'm sorry for hurting you and for disrespecting you?
Now what should I say? Does this mean fog is over?
I am the wandering samurai, and I found my freedom...
Brandon808 ( member #35619) posted at 7:34 PM on Thursday, December 26th, 2013
*crickets*
One text does not mean the fog has lifted. Maybe a dozen texts followed by some real actions could mean the fog has lifted. This one text seems like manipulation, mind games, and/or cake-eating.
numb&dumb ( member #28542) posted at 7:36 PM on Thursday, December 26th, 2013
It may. However you will have to watch and see if this was just a flood of guilt or a real step towards the realization of it.
She may just be to engage you to get some validation or to lull you into being less vigilant. Everything now has subtext. It is maddening.
Just text her back with, "Thank you for acknowledging that." I'll put my last dollar that she will text you back. If she does ask her to elaborate and ask her why now.
Dday 8/31/11. EA/PA. Lied to for 3 years.
Bring it, life. I am ready for you.
StillLivin ( member #40229) posted at 7:39 PM on Thursday, December 26th, 2013
Honey, the fog is only over after her "showing" not "talking".
crickets.
wait. just.wait.and.watch.
"Bitch please a good man can't be stolen." ROFLMAO - SBB: 7/2/2014
confused615 ( member #30826) posted at 7:46 PM on Thursday, December 26th, 2013
It could mean she is starting to "get it."
Or maybe she is trying to manipulate you.
Words are just that..words. What do her actions tell you?
Is this the first time she has apologized? Is this the first time she has admitted how disrespectful she was towards you?
BS(me)44
FWH 48
4 kids
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10
..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.
somanyyears ( member #26970) posted at 7:51 PM on Thursday, December 26th, 2013
..it is your call as to whether you want some communication with her or not.
..I personally would not want to discuss the matter via texting.. you can't see her facial expressions or guage her sincerity with a few text words passed between you.
..she needs to elaborate a helluva lot more but at least its a start. Only you know if her text is 'worth' anything of real value in the big scheme of things.
..is the fog over??? that's a tough one... hence... more discussion is needed with her.
take your time.. these things can't be given the 'quick fix'.. by anyone..period!!!! 
good luck LS..
smy
trust no other human- love only your pets. Reconciled I think! Me 77 Her 74 Married 52 yrs. 18 yr LTA with bff/lawyer. Little fucker died at 57.Brain tumour!
LostSamurai (original poster member #41347) posted at 1:28 AM on Friday, December 27th, 2013
She was acting weird today. She was buying me dinner and stuff and was just given me a whole bunch of compliments...
Could just be some type of trick or whatever but this is the first time she has said anything on those lines. She just started doing these marriage devotionals and communicating with me so, who knows.
I am the wandering samurai, and I found my freedom...
LostSamurai (original poster member #41347) posted at 1:23 PM on Friday, December 27th, 2013
You are all probably right. I probably just got my hopes up all for nothing.
I am the wandering samurai, and I found my freedom...
GotMyLifeBck2013 ( member #40531) posted at 2:02 PM on Friday, December 27th, 2013
Keep doing the 180. The text is the first salvo. It gets much weirder.
I define me! I don't just survive, I thrive!!
Me: fBH 46
Her: exWW 42
DDay: Nov 1, 2012
Divorced: September 17, 2013
steadfast1973 ( member #24719) posted at 2:12 PM on Friday, December 27th, 2013
Is she still seeing OM? Do you still live together? Are you trying to R?
Me- 42- BS Him- 38- WH D-day#1 5/25/09 multi EAs, likely PA, trickle truth, d-day#2 11/06/13 Prostitute Separated 1/2017
"I've seen your flag on the marble arch, our love is not a victory march, it's a cold and broken hallelujah"
LostSamurai (original poster member #41347) posted at 3:02 PM on Friday, December 27th, 2013
GotMyLifeBck2013
I will continue... I will prepare myself.
steadfast1973
She is not seeing the OM. We are not living together now and I would like to Reconcile...but I am slowly going the opposite direction. She and my DD have been staying at her parents house for 2 months now...
I am the wandering samurai, and I found my freedom...
BAMAC ( member #39334) posted at 4:10 PM on Friday, December 27th, 2013
LS,
How do you know she's not still seeing OM? Does she still work with him?
DDays - 1/26/2013 | 3/23/14
Divorced 7/10/2014
LostSamurai (original poster member #41347) posted at 4:43 PM on Friday, December 27th, 2013
She doesn't work with Him, he's my relative and I confronted him secretly.
Now she keeps saying I am sweet man. She is being awfully nice to me. What should I think about all this?
I am the wandering samurai, and I found my freedom...
LostSamurai (original poster member #41347) posted at 5:43 PM on Friday, December 27th, 2013
What in the world. Now she is telling me I am special person. Do WS go through this moment where they think they can smooth things over or something?
I am the wandering samurai, and I found my freedom...
DixieD ( member #33457) posted at 6:02 PM on Friday, December 27th, 2013
Do WS go through this moment where they think they can smooth things over or something?
IMO, YES! Compliments and validation were so easy to give and receive in their affairs. It made unicorn la-la land soooo easy. It should be that easy to work on you too, right?
Wrong.
She doesn't realize yet how hard this is going to be.
Take care LS.
Brandon808 ( member #35619) posted at 6:07 PM on Friday, December 27th, 2013
What should I think about all this?
Nothing. Don't think anything at this point. At this she is just paying some compliments. Compliments to you are not owning her choices. It is not an expression of remorse. It is not an action aimed at R or rebuilding trust.
It's just words.
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