Well I guess I'm back to square one! Awesome!
Almost 5 months from Dday 1, what I though would be the only dday. The only affair, the only ONS. Oh, how wrong I was! I read the thread about ONS with prostitutes & it said something to the effect of "if your WS says they saw 3 prostitutes, just multiply it by 10 and you might have the truth. I guess there's a good chance that's where I'm at.
I had a gut feeling about another 'trip' he took. He went out of town and I met him a day later. Things just didn't feel right, and they weren't. Although he hasn't outright admitted it, he didn't need to. All the Lying signs were there. He didn't deny it, then it was followed by silence, etc. After 12 years of marriage you can tell an outright lie pretty quickly.
Today he's not 'denying' it, but he's not admitting it either. He keeps telling me to send him the proof. Like he doesn't want to admit to anything I don't have solid proof for.
I don't feel like these 2 incidents are the only ones I'm afraid there are several more!
He's got some work issues going on, so I told him I would consider asking him to move out until the work issues were worked out so it didn't add to the issues. Although at this point I'm not sure why I care!!! He clearly doesn't care.
I told him at Dday 1, 5 months ago, that if there were any other skeletons in the closet, now was the time to drag them out! If they came out months later, it would be an entirely different story. He assured me he made 1 mistake and that was it!! I've given him that option several times over the last 5 months and he's given me the same story over and over! Lies on top of lies!
I said he could stay in the house but I would not sleep with a liar. He was not welcome in our bed.
Then tonight, shit hit the fan. I kinda lost it. Begged him for the truth. Asked him if I was worth the truth, clearly I'm not. (I have FOO issues) He still refuses, his attitude is shitty. Entitled, cocky, pissed off, depressed. Said it doesn't matter now, it's over. He's fucked it up, so it doesn't matter what he says, I won't believe him, marriage is ruined, he's lost my trust (no shit), no point...... blah blah blah. He's been stonewalling all day. Rugsweeping for 5 months.
I'm so frustrated, confused, heartbroken...........
Trying to figure out how to get the truth out of him
I though for awhile we were in R! Until I started investigating and realized that there was more.....
This is more of a rant than anything else... if you have wisdom, I'm open. Thanks for listening!!