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Divorce/Separation :
Questions for lawyer

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 myowndystopia (original poster member #41340) posted at 12:18 AM on Monday, January 6th, 2014

I have a 30 minute consult tomorrow with an attorney. I know I have seen on this forum some good questions to ask. Of course now that I'm in need of that I have no idea where I saw it. So.... If you have BTDT send me some questions! I want to make the most of this consult. Or if you know a thread....bump it for me.

Me- BS
Him - WS (the Grub)
married 28 years/4 kids(mostly grown)

"'Cause there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew.
All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true "
Set Fire to the Rain
Adele

posts: 408   ·   registered: Nov. 14th, 2013
id 6625401
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WakingFromADream ( member #33934) posted at 2:28 AM on Monday, January 6th, 2014

Here are a few that should get you started.

How experienced are you in family law?

What percentage of your practice is devoted to family law?

How long have you been practicing?

What is your overall philosophy or style when handling divorce work?

How would you describe your personality as a lawyer?

What is your attitude regarding negotiations and mediation?

Are you more likely to tell me what to do, or offer options and expect me to make a decision?

Do you represent more men or more women?

Do you handle child custody cases?

How well do you know the judges?

How many divorce cases have you tried?

How do you prefer to communicate with clients?

How responsive are you to communications from clients?

Will there be assistants or staff working on my case?

What kind of resources do you make available to clients to make the divorce process less difficult and painful?

What fees and costs can I expect other than charges for your time?

How would you predict a judge would rule on the issues in my case?

Are there are any questions I’ve neglected to ask, or anything else that you can tell me at this time. Is there anything else you should know before deciding whether to hire you?

There are others that you will want to ask based on your circumstances.

Me(37) DS(9) DD 11/16/11 EA(PA?) M 11y D 9/3/13

Don't make anyone a priority when you are only an option.

posts: 1159   ·   registered: Nov. 16th, 2011
id 6625594
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Dreamboat ( member #10506) posted at 2:31 AM on Monday, January 6th, 2014

Ask how much the retainer is and if you can pay with credit card.

Ask what the hourly rate is and if any of the work can be done by a paralegal in the office

Ask about the D process in your state -- how long is the required seperation, how long does it take a non-contested D to work thru the court system, etc

Ask if you can file for fault in your state and if there are any benefits in filing for fault

Ask how much you could expect to pay in total for a non-contested D that does not have any issues or delays

If you have kids then ask about CS

If you and your stbx make vastly different salaries then ask about SS

Ask why you should hire him/her instead of another L

Also, be ready to talk in general about all assets and debts. Have a basic idea about how many credit cards you have and the general balance, any car loans, any student loans, any other loans, how much money you have in investments, in 401K, in IRA's, in savings, any pensions you may have, general terms of your mortgage or rental agreement, etc.

Also be prepared to talk about what you want in the settlement and what is most important to you (example: if you want to keep the house or if you want primary custody of the kids or you to keep your own 401K and/or pension, or whatever is most important to you)

Good luck

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine

posts: 17695   ·   registered: Apr. 25th, 2006   ·   location: A better place :)
id 6625601
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 myowndystopia (original poster member #41340) posted at 6:28 AM on Monday, January 6th, 2014

Thank you. These are some great ideas to add to my list!

Me- BS
Him - WS (the Grub)
married 28 years/4 kids(mostly grown)

"'Cause there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew.
All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true "
Set Fire to the Rain
Adele

posts: 408   ·   registered: Nov. 14th, 2013
id 6625868
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letmeout ( new member #41863) posted at 6:31 AM on Monday, January 6th, 2014

If your spouse has hired an attorney already ask if he has had dealing in that past with that particular lawyer.

If he knows the other lawyer he can usually clue you in right away how easy or hard working with that person will be. The games to expect etc.

posts: 36   ·   registered: Jan. 1st, 2014
id 6625873
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ItHappened2Me2 ( member #32503) posted at 3:23 PM on Monday, January 6th, 2014

THANK YOU for posting this myowndystopia!

And THANK YOU to those who have responded. I have my first consult today as well and I will use these!!!!

BS - me (57 now); WS - him (57 now)
DD 21o, DS 17 yo
Married 25 years (together 27+/-)
DDay #1 - March 18, 2011
DD #2 (after 3 + month TT and false R -- the affair had gone underground) - June 28,2011
DD3: June 19, 2013
DIVORCED!!!! and doing well

posts: 250   ·   registered: Jun. 16th, 2011   ·   location: Texas
id 6626163
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 myowndystopia (original poster member #41340) posted at 3:47 AM on Monday, January 13th, 2014

Bump.....

Me- BS
Him - WS (the Grub)
married 28 years/4 kids(mostly grown)

"'Cause there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew.
All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true "
Set Fire to the Rain
Adele

posts: 408   ·   registered: Nov. 14th, 2013
id 6636913
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TheAgonyOfIt ( member #39114) posted at 9:40 AM on Thursday, January 23rd, 2014

Wow had my first consult with attorney today and my head is spinning. I only WISH I had recorded it all so could listen to it again!!

Me BS 49, ExWS: narcissist! Jekyll Hyde. Left in secret early July, moved states. Left home, job, whole life behind and difficult** adjusting. Dog injured and too much to handle. Supremely bummed out.

posts: 557   ·   registered: Apr. 27th, 2013   ·   location: theagonyofit
id 6652268
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