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hopped off the bus..then got back on...

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dignityintact posted 1/10/2014 06:30 AM

So the last few months of last year I was seeing a guy I met from online dating…it was fun, he was super attentive, nothing serious as we both said no complications - both having children.
Anyway, we got "together" over Xmas - it was a blast! Then 2 days later, actually NY eve, he texts me that he had "acquired" a gf…at first I thought it was a joke, and he was referring to me…but he wasn't!! Seriously, I trusted this guy!! Had no idea where she came from, or where he had the time to meet her…or was she always there??? I sense I was played!

It's been a little upsetting…but the best bit is…I survived!! and as I politely told him, when he wanted us to remain friends (!), that I had survived a lot worse.

It is true…yes, it knocks you back, and you question why there are so many awful people out there, who have no respect for other humans…..but you can get through it. I survived my exh of over 20 yrs moving me to the other side of the world, before he walked out on us for ow, and then moved back to my home country, where she followed to. I can cope.

I have no regrets, and the getting "together" was pretty good…much better than during my marriage….am a little sad that there is a gf who may get hurt by this guy, but she'll figure it out. I believe in karma, and this guy will get his just deserts one day.

Anyway, just wanted to say, be careful, but you can get through things, as we've been through the worse we possibly can.

veelop5 posted 1/10/2014 07:37 AM

I just went through a 5 month relationship that just ended...and at first I thought it would be a lot harder than it has been...because everyone here has said the first break up is worse than the break up of your marriage...I too was married for over 20 years...I am surviving and I actually feel ok with it....I look at it as I had a good time and got off the bus too ;-)...We can only learn and get stronger...sorry this happened to you.

EvenKeel posted 1/10/2014 07:58 AM

Maybe you were not being played (in his mind):

nothing serious as we both said no complications

He might of seen your relationship as casual dating and fun. Unless you had discussion that you guys were exclusive; he may of been casually dating others (ie like this other girl)?

IDK - just brainstorming because you said he did not seem like a creep (til now).

I agree it is crappy that he slept with you if that was the case. If he wanted to move you guys to a FWB sort of deal; that should of been discussed so no one assumed it meant the next step, etc.

I am so glad to hear you are ok though. I am one of those folks that talk about that first heartbreak after D. Mine was awful!!!

PS - HE TEXTED YOU TO TELL YOU? Gosh whatta coward!!!!!

dignityintact posted 1/10/2014 16:09 PM

yes, he texted me…on NY Eve!!
Needless to say, I am no longer in touch with him.

Shame, the sex was good….

we did talk about being fwb, but you know, you live and learn….this other girl must have been on the scene….I just feel sorry for her - what a catch!!

Anyway, it's just a blip on the path to something great…all is well x

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