I think it would be difficult to define bullying and judging as there is too much left to interpretation and the receiver's own perception. That being said, one of the things I love about this site is the fact that we have so many different kinds if people with different styles and different approaches.
Some people are very direct, some are more warm and fuzzy, and some come from an 'I can relate, here is my story' perspective. I have actually watched some members evolve from one style to another as they heal and grow and become more comfortable with who they are. No style is wrong or better than the other. Each serve their purpose as the receiver may respond better to one more than another.
Speaking for myself, I would never be where I am today if everyone had been all Kumbaya. I needed some tough love. I needed truth. I needed to learn to respond to it without being defensive. I knew enough that when something stung or I dug in my heels that I needed to look at it a bit more closely and figure out why.
I do think there is a difference between being honest and being brutally honest. The intent is was makes the difference. Someone can be honest with you. For example, you are a liar. Sounds mean, but it's true. Where as if someone were to say you are fat, no good in bed, well that is meant to hurt. It may be true, but the intent has changed.
Fortunately we have moderators that can help us with such situations. I would not hesitate to use them. They do a fantastic job of fielding tricky situations. What other site has a specially protected place for WSs to work their stuff out AND moderators to boot?