The best you can do given that you don't want to move out or file is to lead a life separate from hers..
This will help whether or not you have hope for R..
Shore up your support network.. Put yourself in a position where you have stuff to do, people to see on your own, without WW..
Your goal is to thrive living on your own without WW..
Please, please do protect yourself financially and with any custody issues, if you have any..
Your WW may pull more rugs out from under your feet.. She may try to spend all of the marital savings, get you in trouble/kicked out of the house on false DV charges, etc, etc...
At least being forewarned and protected can help..
I am in similar situation ( in house separation)..My WH is un remorseful, no hope of R..
If a time comes when you decide that you are done and R is not possible anymore, I have a few helpful hints below...
Even though I would love to be in a decent position to file for D NOW, if I filed today it would be extremely poor timing and hurt me in the long run..
So living a separate life without taking WH's preferences, schedule, etc, is what is saving my sanity..
I know I risk the possibility of being 1/2 responsible if WH accumulates charges on his credit cards..
Filing for D would stop the bleeding in this respect..But all credit cards are in his name only.....
My WH knows that there is no hope for R but I haven't asked for a divorce to happen within a particular time frame..
I am waiting for my status (financial, employability) to change..I have also been waiting for WH's status to change, which it did this past week..
WH is now employed as of a week ago..This is the first time he has held a job in two years..
We have been married 37 years..
So be mindful of how much time you want to stay in the same house with WW when there is no hope for R..
Be wary of timing and its impact on you if/when you file for divorce.. Keep this timing in mind..
Don't let your WW know of your intention to divorce her until you have finances and living situation figured out and protected..
This has been my way of doing things, because I am anticipating that my WH will go BALLISTIC and off the rails when he finally gets served..
Sending you strength
[This message edited by doggiediva at 2:08 PM, January 19th (Sunday)]