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The worst part of being a single full-time working mom....

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 She11ybeanz (original poster member #27457) posted at 1:33 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

Is leaving my 17 month old at home really sick! I took off yesterday to take her to the doctor and I had to wait an hour at their office and then an hour at the damn pharmacy (because the stupid pharmacist "forgot" to check his messages so her meds would be ready) I sat in a chair feeling helpless holding her while she laid her head on my chest moaning pathetically ONLY for one of the pharmacists to tell me that he didn't have one of prescriptions I needed (HE DIDN'T KNOW THIS INFORMATION 45 MINUTES AGO?????) and I would have to drive to one of two pharmacies that were AT LEAST 20-30 MINUTES away!!!! I was exasperated at this point and in tears holding my wailing and miserably tired sick child in my arms and asked the guy if there was a pharmacy closer than hell I could go to! One of them was smart right back but the other one found a little sympathy in my situation.

He called one close to where I live but it wouldn't be ready for an hour. I drove home and got my daughter in some PJs....gave her the antibiotic that I DID have and some juice to keep her hydrated. She has been projectile vomiting since Friday night. And, then I discovered she had bad diarrhea to boot! The doctor also discovered an ear infection (hence the antibiotic) but I had nothing yet for the puking and diarrhea).

I laid her in her crib but she cried for me not 20 minutes later.... so I went and got her and laid her down in my bed with me with her fuzzy blankets and rubbed her head.... she fell immediately asleep and we napped together for 3 hours....before I went BACK to the pharmacy for some probiotic powder for the butt issue and some Phenigren for the puking problem.

I had to leave her to go to work this morning with her nana at my house and feel like the worst mother on the planet. If I weren't a single mom, I would be home with my sick baby right now. I used the last little bit of leave I had for yesterday or I would have called in to be with her. I hated leaving her. Its moments like these being a single mom truly TRULY sucks.......

[This message edited by She11ybeanz at 7:37 AM, January 21st (Tuesday)]

"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12

posts: 2767   ·   registered: Feb. 4th, 2010   ·   location: Virginia
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Pentup ( member #20563) posted at 1:48 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

(((Shelly and baby)))

You left her at home with someone who loves her that you know will take good care of her. Hang in there today.

Me- BS
Him- FWS (I hope- F)

posts: 8410   ·   registered: Aug. 8th, 2008   ·   location: Not Oz
id 6649100
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 She11ybeanz (original poster member #27457) posted at 1:57 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

I would do anything to be with her right now....I don't know how I'm going to survive the day....

"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12

posts: 2767   ·   registered: Feb. 4th, 2010   ·   location: Virginia
id 6649116
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lifestoshort ( member #18442) posted at 3:43 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

its times of being away from our children too, that make up better more loving parents. If I were with mine every second of everyday, I would not appreciate them as much. she too will appreciate when you get back. you are doing the best you can. do not beat yourself up. we are not super women.

Im 45. 1st H I left in 2001 after 3 kids. narcassist.
2nd exH had MANY affairs.FALSE R. cheats again. D 5/09. 2 kids. I got 100% custody. ex hasnt seen kids in 6 yrs.
2014 to now: dated highschool sweetheart. He cheated w 23 yr old & left.

posts: 1061   ·   registered: Mar. 2nd, 2008
id 6649264
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k94ever ( member #11176) posted at 3:50 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

Sweetheart you ARE NOT the worse mom in the world. You are a loving mom doing what we do.

Look at it this way. If you had stuck with Sperm Doner do you really think he would be pitching in and helping with the poopy cloths/bedsheets/vomit stuff?

I don't thing so.

You'd STILL be doing it all by yourself. AND you would have to still take care of him.

From my POV you are much better off.

But {{{{{{{tons of hugs 'cause I've been there}}}}}}

k9

BS:61
WS: 53
Betrayed: 24 years
Affairs: 15 (2 lasted 3 months. Rest were ONS)
WS died: 16 May 2011
Do not stay in your hurt forever. Choose to move out of it.

posts: 7747   ·   registered: Jul. 3rd, 2006   ·   location: Wisconsin
id 6649290
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jrc1963 ( member #26531) posted at 5:22 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

(((Shelly)))

You are not not not the worst mom in the world. You sound like a very loving, nurturing, caring mom!

I am sure her Nana will take very good care of your precious DD!

Hang in there sweetie!

Me: BSO - 56 Him: FWSO - 79 DS - 23 D-Day - 12-11-09, R - he finally came homeYour life is an Occasion. Rise to it. - Mr. Magorium, "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium"

posts: 26375   ·   registered: Dec. 14th, 2009   ·   location: Michigan
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Gottagetthrough ( member #27325) posted at 7:29 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

you are so far from the worst mom in the world . You are caring, loving and nurturing.

I hope that you have gotten through (most) of the day and can spend some quality time with your little on tonight. (((SHELLY)))

I hope your little one is feeling better, too.

posts: 3843   ·   registered: Jan. 22nd, 2010
id 6649649
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GrievingMommy ( member #28127) posted at 9:43 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

I agree with the previous posters that you are FAR from the worst mother on the planet.....because you have to work while your little one is sick! I'm a single full-time working mom as well and we have to do what we have to do to survive.

I'm glad Piper has her Nana to take care of her when her Mommy can't be there. She'll be fine hun.

I've had to take my kids to my employer's daycare for sick kiddos (so the employees can work). That is hard taking them to strangers but they do fine and won't be harmed by it and I don't always have a choice.

Bottom line. She'll be okay and so will you. Hope she's feeling better!

Oh, and even if you weren't a single parent, it doesn't mean that you'd be home with her - the possible only logical option due to time off availibilty is for your spouse to be home with her. I try and tell myself that too - some things might not always be different if I wasn't a single parent.

((((((hugs))))))

Me - Now 36 y/o
WXH: Now 45 y/o and 18+ hrs away -NPD asshole now onto wife #3.
My sweeties: 5 yr old B/G twins. 90% custody (or more) since 14 months old.
D-Day 4/4/10 PA('s?) & EA's - D'd 7/11

posts: 1691   ·   registered: Apr. 4th, 2010   ·   location: Upper Midwest
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Tawnee1969 ( member #12358) posted at 11:43 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

Shelly, I was a single Mum for 15 years. The way I had to cope was by having "bad mummy points".

You have to laugh about it or you will cry. Once when I was over whelmed with working, kids etc I dropped my youngest to school on a student free day, only to have him run alongside the car tapping at the window to let me know. Another time he didn't catch me and the school called to let me know and I HAD to work so I had to call my neighbour to pick him up.

I had really good bosses so if I had to work and he was only feeling a bit iffy, he came to work with me.

I am a horrible cook so food was always hit and miss.

He is now 16 and other son is 24. They both lived and love me to death, so I didn't do too badly.

Give yourself a break and share with other Mums your "bad mummy points". We all have them.

Is the f*cking you're getting, worth the f*cking you're getting?

posts: 722   ·   registered: Oct. 17th, 2006
id 6650059
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 She11ybeanz (original poster member #27457) posted at 1:26 AM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

Oh GOSH....please keep my baby in your prayers. Her nana called me at 1pm today and she had vomited and had such bad diarrhea that we feared dehydration. I had to leave work to get a prescription filled for a phenagren suppository to help with the vomiting otherwise she would most likely have to go to the ER. I had already taken her to the doctor the day before and spent an hour in the pharmacy for an oral phenagren, some anthrimicin (can't spell...antibiotic for an ear infection she has too) and then some probiotic powder to put in her drinks to help with the diarrhea.... all to no avail.

I was in tears leaving work worried about her. When I got home....she seemed okay....but I gave her the suppository...took nana home.... and then took a nap with her in my bed. Gave her a little bit of what bland dinner she would eat and plenty of fluids... and kept her sipping even in the bath to keep her as hydrated as possible..

She is in bed now.... and I pray for a quiet night of no vomiting or diarrhea..... I am planning on taking tomorrow off to be with her because I think she needs me. I have had to come home twice now in two days to either take her to the doctor or get a prescription filled in an emergency. I want to make sure I'm prepared if the ER becomes our only option....

Please pray for her. I just want my baby to get better. I love her so so very much.

[This message edited by She11ybeanz at 7:36 PM, January 21st (Tuesday)]

"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12

posts: 2767   ·   registered: Feb. 4th, 2010   ·   location: Virginia
id 6650234
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MissesJai ( member #24849) posted at 1:30 AM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

She will get better, I promise you. This bug is nasty, so just keep her hydrated and make sure you get some rest too. You can't take care of her if you're not well.

44
Happily divorcing..
My Life is Mine!!!!
#BlackLivesMatter
Don't settle for no fuck shit....

posts: 7497   ·   registered: Jul. 17th, 2009   ·   location: So Cal.....
id 6650241
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hitbyatruck ( member #23769) posted at 6:28 AM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

big prayers for your sweet little one. You are a very good Mom!

Married 1998. 2 kids. First discovery 3/2009. Multiple affairs, porn addiction. one failed attempt at R. Nested for over a year. Divorce final 8/2015. XH is now married. I am engaged!

posts: 3329   ·   registered: Apr. 27th, 2009
id 6650643
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Pentup ( member #20563) posted at 2:35 PM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

Checking in to see how she is this morning?

Me- BS
Him- FWS (I hope- F)

posts: 8410   ·   registered: Aug. 8th, 2008   ·   location: Not Oz
id 6650904
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 She11ybeanz (original poster member #27457) posted at 3:36 PM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

She stayed with me in my bed til about 1am.... making sounds that sounded like dry heaving but I think it might have been the phenagren fighting the vomiting. The diarrhea is still there but not quite as prominent this morning.....she is now napping.

I'm missing another day of work. I wish this nightmare would stop. I can't lose my job. I need it. I'm the only provider....but I know my daughter needs me.....its a torturous balance....

"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12

posts: 2767   ·   registered: Feb. 4th, 2010   ·   location: Virginia
id 6651002
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Pentup ( member #20563) posted at 4:01 PM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

Will your boss allow you to make lost time?

Glad Piper is at least a little better.

Me- BS
Him- FWS (I hope- F)

posts: 8410   ·   registered: Aug. 8th, 2008   ·   location: Not Oz
id 6651052
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Gottagetthrough ( member #27325) posted at 5:14 PM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

oh I am so sorry... praying that she is getting better today.

posts: 3843   ·   registered: Jan. 22nd, 2010
id 6651178
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Whalers11 ( member #27544) posted at 5:30 PM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

Can you leave here with Nana for a few hours to go into work for a little bit and get a few things done?

posts: 3358   ·   registered: Feb. 11th, 2010
id 6651206
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k94ever ( member #11176) posted at 9:03 PM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

Is there any work you can do at home?

Is your boss open to telecommuting for a couple of days?

{{{hugs}}}

Piper will get better.

k9

BS:61
WS: 53
Betrayed: 24 years
Affairs: 15 (2 lasted 3 months. Rest were ONS)
WS died: 16 May 2011
Do not stay in your hurt forever. Choose to move out of it.

posts: 7747   ·   registered: Jul. 3rd, 2006   ·   location: Wisconsin
id 6651556
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 She11ybeanz (original poster member #27457) posted at 2:04 AM on Thursday, January 23rd, 2014

I'm already in the negative now for sick leave as far as this week goes so I offered to bring work home with me this weekend and work through some lunches. My boss is pretty flexible.... I've been up packing tonight after she went to bed and am now spent....I think a half a glass of wine and its bedtime for me....

Goodnight all

"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12

posts: 2767   ·   registered: Feb. 4th, 2010   ·   location: Virginia
id 6651955
default

JanaGreen ( member #29341) posted at 4:32 AM on Thursday, January 23rd, 2014

((Hugs)) I'm sorry hon - I can vouch though that I've had to leave mine home sick too. DH and I tag team usually. I hate leaving her when she's sick too but work has to get done, bills have to be paid. I hope your sweetie feels better soon.

posts: 9505   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2010   ·   location: Southeast US
id 6652145
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