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Newest Member: LonelyandUnsure

Wayward Side :
Tracking - BS welcome

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 Wayflost (original poster member #41583) posted at 9:39 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

Does anyone have an application that they and their BS really like for tracking purposes? I have an iPhone, and have a program called friend finder installed. But it's shoddy, and in the past several months has caused my BH to suffer further anxiety and stress about my actual location. For example, I had an appointment with my IC and the program showed me 5 miles away at the mall. Fortunately the C was willing and able to verify my location with ease. As if it weren't bad enough that I caused him to feel the need to check in on my location, but the hiccups in the system then cause him further angst, and all because I cannot be trusted.

So, I am looking for a different program or option for him to check in when he feels the need. I want something reliable so that he can trust I am where it shows, and hopefully where it shows will be where I've communicated I am. I'm looking to show consistency, and honesty. And I want to reassure him, not cause him further pain.

Any suggestions would be VERY welcome. Thanks!

"Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly."

posts: 762   ·   registered: Dec. 9th, 2013
id 6649858
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Aubrie ( member #33886) posted at 9:42 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

Well, my mother "invited" everyone in the family to Life360, then successfully stalked all of us till we got a clue and disabled the app.

It was pretty accurate and we could all check in and whatnot.

It's been about a year since I disabled the app on my phone so someone else would have to chime in as far as recent reliability.

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

posts: 7926   ·   registered: Nov. 11th, 2011
id 6649867
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TattoodChinaDoll ( member #34602) posted at 9:44 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

We use Life360 and the Find iPhone app. Both work well most of the time. If one is on the fritz the other is a back up.

[This message edited by TattoodChinaDoll at 3:44 PM, January 21st (Tuesday)]

Me: 35
WH: 37 TimeToManUp
Married: 14 years, together 19 years
3 daughters: 12, 8, 6, and 2 angel babies (2013 and 2014)

D-Day: 12/21/2011
Confronted him: 12/22/2011

This is the most difficult thing I've ever done.

posts: 1841   ·   registered: Jan. 20th, 2012   ·   location: New Jersey
id 6649873
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remorsefulww ( member #42029) posted at 9:44 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

Lookout mobile security. Make sure you create an account and verify in order for it to work. There is a "missing device option" that can tell you where your device is. All you have to do is log in from any computer and device and click the find missing device.

DD 1 2009 EA/PA, DD 2 2014, broke nc 2015.All the same AP
His DD 9/16/2015 ONS & EA,PA with coworker.
Mad Hatters
WW/BW Me
BH/WHJSG1

posts: 82   ·   registered: Jan. 12th, 2014   ·   location: new york
id 6649877
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turtle72 ( member #21773) posted at 11:05 PM on Tuesday, January 21st, 2014

I use Find my iPhone and it is pretty darn accurate.

Me: 41 BS/WW/BS
2 kids 9 & 11, 3 steps 20, 8 and 3
BS 1st DDay 10/14/08, 5 mo. PA w/ MOW
WW 2nd D-Day 3/22/10, my exit A with HS BF
Separated 4/19/10
Married H #2 10/8/11
BS latest Dday 12/28/13 - PA w/ single COW

posts: 2207   ·   registered: Nov. 24th, 2008   ·   location: Massachusetts
id 6650014
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Sammy2013 ( member #41040) posted at 4:07 AM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

The find IPhone app is pretty accurate. But I would suggest a back up as anything can have glitches. I had huge anxiety attack when WH was away on a business trip. It showed him in the correct state, but then I zoomed in on satellite and it put him at a personal residence (huge house with a pool). I caught him with the app on DDay so, yeah, huge trigger. He face timed me from his meeting (discretely) and then excused himself to calm me down. It sucked. So absolutely have a back up.

WH -42;BS (me) 43
Married 17 years, 3 kiddos
First DDay 9/13. TT and 3 more DDays in the 6 months to follow. Reconciled in year 4 of the 2-5 year range.

posts: 264   ·   registered: Oct. 19th, 2013   ·   location: Southeast United States
id 6650514
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AgainandAgain ( member #34835) posted at 4:14 AM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

I agree with the previous posters. Find my iPhone app is spot on. It located one of our lost phones within a few feet in the middle of a park.

Hope that helps!

posts: 246   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2012
id 6650523
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KatieG ( member #41222) posted at 11:33 AM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

So do you need the Apple ID and password to log into iCloud and locate the phone. Slight t/j here but does the phone (person) you are trying to locate get notification?

DD#1 - Oct 13

"Everyone says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive" - CS Lewis

posts: 822   ·   registered: Nov. 4th, 2013
id 6650744
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mystified1970 ( member #36291) posted at 12:18 PM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

Find my iPhone does not alert the person you are tracking. It will show the geosettings(?) thingamajigger briefly on their screen but it's not noticeable. I use it frequently as it calms my wonderings.

heavy sigh

posts: 90   ·   registered: Jul. 28th, 2012   ·   location: Texas
id 6650762
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heartbrokeninaz ( member #40779) posted at 12:26 PM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

We have life360. I will tell you its not always accurate. I freaked out one day because it said my WH was at a circle k about half a mile from his work for hours. I finally couldn't take it and drove over there. He was at work but that's not where the app was placing him. Most of the time it is spot on though.

BW 51(me)WH 51DDay 1 07/31/13 ONS with whorenado DDay 2 05/09/14 texts to another woman (not returned)Dday 3 06 15/18 texting to meetup with a mutual friend not reciprocated. I live a real life fairy tale.

posts: 376   ·   registered: Sep. 24th, 2013   ·   location: Phoenix
id 6650769
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turtle72 ( member #21773) posted at 12:30 PM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

Yes, you need their Apple ID, and no, they don't receive notification. Although there is a "play a sound" feature on the app that I accidentally hit while WH was driving down the highway the other day and scared the crap out of him.

We used Lookout Mobile Security when we had androids and it was a great app too.

All of these apps have some margin of error. One day WH had to run an errand for work. It showed him going in the direction he should have been, but then showed him stopped at a Wendy's parking lot. He already had lunch so I started to panic that he had met the COW there. When he got home he told me about the errand and losing his patience at a very long traffic light - and of course the light was in front of a Wendy's. I don't know exactly what I thought would be happening in the time it takes for a long light cycle, but that moment of fear was there.

Me: 41 BS/WW/BS
2 kids 9 & 11, 3 steps 20, 8 and 3
BS 1st DDay 10/14/08, 5 mo. PA w/ MOW
WW 2nd D-Day 3/22/10, my exit A with HS BF
Separated 4/19/10
Married H #2 10/8/11
BS latest Dday 12/28/13 - PA w/ single COW

posts: 2207   ·   registered: Nov. 24th, 2008   ·   location: Massachusetts
id 6650779
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Prayingforhope ( member #41801) posted at 12:39 PM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014

Agree on Find My iPhone feature. It's amazing and it works easily without having to install anything.

Just activate it on your iPhone, give your BS your Apple ID so she can log in to the web page whenever she wants to and done.

I turned this on just a few days after DDay and I've never been so grateful I did. I have no idea how much she uses it (there is no notification, no log files, etc.) BUT I feel good to know she knows where I am whenever she needs to.

There is power in the transparency and living in the light..Good luck!

WH 41
BS 40
D-Day Oct 28th, 2013
Together 18 years
Three amazing boys 12, 9 & 6
Praying for hope daily

posts: 260   ·   registered: Dec. 27th, 2013
id 6650785
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sodamnlost ( member #37190) posted at 7:45 PM on Saturday, February 8th, 2014

Find my iPhone does not alert the person you are tracking. It will show the geosettings(?) thingamajigger briefly on their screen but it's not noticeable. I use it frequently as it calms my wonderings

In the settings they can tell if it has been used recently. Last 24 hours even.

Me - BS original Dday 10-2012, separated June 2014, divorce Fall 2016


Grief, loss and pain taunt her - "you will never be the same." Like a Phoenix rising from the ashes, she rises and spreads her new wings as she brushes off the ashes an

posts: 772   ·   registered: Oct. 19th, 2012   ·   location: Out of the ashes
id 6676877
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AdamsApple ( new member #39262) posted at 9:54 PM on Saturday, February 8th, 2014

We use Life 360. But it seems to drop out a lot. We have WiFi that blankets our city (which we have access to). That seems to interfere with L360. For it to work properly, we need to turn off WiFi or constantly make sure that we are logged into it.

If I was still really concerned, I would go with the program that my phone company provides (for a monthly fee). I know that Sprint and Verizon both have something like that.

posts: 37   ·   registered: May. 14th, 2013   ·   location: United States
id 6676983
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 Wayflost (original poster member #41583) posted at 5:49 AM on Sunday, February 9th, 2014

Thanks all. I installed a couple of programs, and am making a go of it. BH actually seemed to resent it, or rather, the need for it. But I have few ways of "proving" anything and this is one of them.

We'll see how it goes.

"Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly."

posts: 762   ·   registered: Dec. 9th, 2013
id 6677425
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SlowUptake ( member #40484) posted at 6:54 AM on Sunday, February 9th, 2014

A little piece of advice from my experience.

I was quite proud of myself when I, on my own without prompting, put a GPS tracker app on my phone.

Went to my BS like a puppy waging it's tail expecting a pat on the back for being so proactive helping her to feel safe.

The reaction, "All that does is let me know where your phone is, not you."

Don't get too despondant if you don't get the reaction you expect.

Me:WS,50+
Her:BS,50+ (WantToWakeUp)
Married 33yrs
Dday Dec 2009

"Do not say a little in many words but a great deal in a few." Pythagoras

There are two kinds of people in the world.
Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.

posts: 390   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2013   ·   location: Limbo in Oz
id 6677451
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Asil0623 ( member #42419) posted at 10:54 PM on Monday, February 10th, 2014

Find my iphone is fairly accurate. I have used it since DD.

[This message edited by Asil0623 at 12:46 PM, February 17th (Monday)]

Me-BS
Him- FWH 1 yr+LTA w/ COW
DDay Dec 2013
R March 2015
Happy Again

posts: 76   ·   registered: Feb. 10th, 2014
id 6679827
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the past is gone ( member #28813) posted at 2:01 AM on Friday, February 14th, 2014

I have an iPhone but WH has a galaxy phone. So any advice on what app to use?

posts: 160   ·   registered: Jun. 16th, 2010   ·   location: It's hot here
id 6684798
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william ( member #41986) posted at 4:11 PM on Friday, February 14th, 2014

id love an app that shows location history of the iphone on the pc, not just where htey are when you check...

me - bh
her - lara01

from 09/11 - 05/13
2 ONS, 10 sexting partners, 1 LT EA/PA

??/06/13 DD/1 - admits to LT EA, begin false R.
01/13/14 DD/2 - LTA was PA.
01/18/14 DD/3 - sexting 5 guys.
01/19/14 DD/4 - 2 ONS with different guys

posts: 2162   ·   registered: Jan. 9th, 2014
id 6685653
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Lionne ( member #25560) posted at 1:33 AM on Sunday, February 16th, 2014

Life 360 allows PC check in as well as phone. Also location history. It has improved. And is free. But glitchy. Important to realize that these are GPS based. If satellite reception is poor, the app may not work perfectly.

Me-BS-71 in May HIM-SAFWH-74 I just wanted a normal life.Normal trauma would have been appreciated.

posts: 8533   ·   registered: Sep. 18th, 2009   ·   location: In my head
id 6687565
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