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Newest Member: timeheals (61501)

User Topic: Still so hard
♀ 41603
Member # 41603
Default  Posted: 2:08 AM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It's been a couple month since my WS cheated online. I throw in his face his infidelity but not on purpose. It comes up in conversation. He wants trust but it is too soon for that. Then when we are making plans for our future he says he is worried he has a future planned for himself in case I leave. I say if you don't cheat it won't be a problem. Then I asked him to quit social media. He went on to get a recipe that was in his inbox. I clearly stated I would get it off the mail box. I don't want him tempted. Then he quit taking his medication. He becomes defensive and angry when he doesn't take it. We need a marriage counselor. The one we saw was temporary but I need one permanent. I think he thinks this will all just go away. I asked him to post on this site to seek help too but all he did was create a profile. I am so upset. My mom got breast cancer so I am spending time away from home. Last time he was deployed he sex chatted with another woman. I am so wound tight. I am afraid. I can't trust but I love him with all my heart.

Still in love

Posts: 10 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: Virginia
♀ 41764
Member # 41764
Default  Posted: 5:04 AM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It's been over 10 months since I found out and I am still in limbo trying to figure out what's right. I can tell you 100% for sure - you guys have to see some kind of therapist together. Sometimes it is hard for me to talk without being angry and making snarky comments and we often don't really "hear" each other.
I will also say, he has to be 100% committed to making it work and making sacrifices to show you he wants it to work. My WH deleted fb, changed his phone number and changed his email. I wouldn't even be considering working it out if he hadn't taken these steps. He's also in IC.
Good luck. And remember if you want it to work, keep trying

Me: BS, 30
Him: WS, 30
D-Day: April 2013 (about 5 years of cheating with multiple OW)
2 or 3? false R.
DIVORCED! 07/2014!!

Posts: 26 | Registered: Dec 2013
Topic Posts: 2

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