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Chrysalis123 (original poster member #27148) posted at 2:52 PM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014
Post decree mediation tomorrow, NPD-x filed a motion to modify CS, SS, and parenting time. I hired a brilliant lawyer that has punched holes all over his motion in the response he wrote.
NPD-x began by requesting the judge expedite the hearing and skip required mediation due to dire financial straits...he makes $96,000/year. He wants to immediately modify parenting time deviating from the decree when oldest DD emancipates in 4 months, and younger kid is off to college in August and lives 100% with me (for over 3 years) and would rather stick forks in her eyes than live 50% with NPD-x and live in GF.
Much of it is just nuts, but the below takes the cake....
NPD-x took out a $60,000 second mortgage before divorce without my knowledge. Very suspicious and murky real estate deal without clear paperwork. Decree states specifics, which of course NPD-x claims are now not true. He and his lawyer are stating all kinds of numbers without any supporting documentation and expect me to just say, "OK, sounds great."
NPD-x claims I have a third of the money he borrowed (decree says nothing about this), he had 2/3 of it and spent if after the decree was signed on living expenses and other things. He wants my 1/3 back and wants me then to pay my 50% of the loan he took out. So to clarify, he gets to spend all the money he stole..I mean borrowed, and I get to pay half of it for him.... You can't make this stuff up.
One thing I have learned from this is all those emails I saved....saved my butt. I have emails from him refuting most of the distortions he is claiming. 
Mediation is tomorrow at 9AM.
[This message edited by Chrysalis123 at 10:44 AM, January 22nd (Wednesday)]
Someone I once loved gave me/ a box full of darkness/ It took me years to understand/ That this, too, was a gift. - Mary Oliver
Just for the record darling, not all positive changes feel positive in the beginning -S C Lourie
dmari ( member #37215) posted at 3:40 PM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014
One thing I have learned from this is all those emails I saved....saved my butt. I have emails from him refuting most of the distortions he is claiming.
THANK GOODNESS!! Good luck tomorrow! Sounds like he hired a shark to scare you but you have your ducks in a row. Please keep us updated when you can!!
caregiver9000 ( member #28622) posted at 4:42 PM on Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014
(((Chrys))) Your post is a perfect example of NPD logic. He wants it, he wants it right now, and the entire world and court system should jump to suit him.
Sounds like he is in a bit of financial trouble. Awwwww, shucks. Couldn't happen to a more deserving twit.
Mojo to you, but I suspect you will need self control not to roll your eyes or snicker more than you will need mojo.
I will hope for brilliance in spades for your L. I hope the law pokes holes in your X!!!
Me: fortysomething, independent, happy,
XH "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
two kids, teens. Old enough I am truly NO CONTACT w/ NPD zebraduck
S 5/2010
D 12/2012
Skan ( member #35812) posted at 3:05 AM on Thursday, January 23rd, 2014
I hope that he's hoisted by his petard during a gale-force wind. MOJO!
Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.
D-Day, June 10, 2012
nekorb ( member #40306) posted at 5:48 PM on Thursday, January 23rd, 2014
Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 M - 22 Years
D-day: 7/2013; D filed 7/2014; Divorced 7-27-16
...the WS affair starts off in a dreamland where everything is all Golly, Wow! and Meant To Be! and Soul Mates drop from the trees to frolic in the mist. -devotedman
Chrysalis123 (original poster member #27148) posted at 6:45 PM on Thursday, January 23rd, 2014
Still happening. Frustrating and I will report back later.
Someone I once loved gave me/ a box full of darkness/ It took me years to understand/ That this, too, was a gift. - Mary Oliver
Just for the record darling, not all positive changes feel positive in the beginning -S C Lourie
peridot ( member #18334) posted at 7:12 PM on Thursday, January 23rd, 2014
I hope everything goes well for you!
I think...therefore, I'm single.
It is what it is.
Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 7:29 PM on Thursday, January 23rd, 2014
Still sending good vibes...
Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU
hexed ( member #19258) posted at 8:28 PM on Thursday, January 23rd, 2014
thinking of you. hope its going ok
But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned
“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler
Chrysalis123 (original poster member #27148) posted at 10:34 PM on Thursday, January 23rd, 2014
It was a huge, expensive waste of time. I am feeling pretty upset over it, as I found out he wants to financially ruin me.
It's sick, truly sick.
I have an email to my lawyer about next steps, pros/cons and costs.
I feel pretty upset. 
This too shall pass....This too shall pass.....
Someone I once loved gave me/ a box full of darkness/ It took me years to understand/ That this, too, was a gift. - Mary Oliver
Just for the record darling, not all positive changes feel positive in the beginning -S C Lourie
caregiver9000 ( member #28622) posted at 11:06 PM on Thursday, January 23rd, 2014
(((hugs)))
as I found out he wants to financially ruin me.
Of course he does. That is NPD thinking. Destroy the BS. I am sorry you are on his radar!! Maybe he will get bored or be thwarted enough to give up.
Either way, you are correct: it will pass.
MORE (((hugs)))
Me: fortysomething, independent, happy,
XH "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
two kids, teens. Old enough I am truly NO CONTACT w/ NPD zebraduck
S 5/2010
D 12/2012
dmari ( member #37215) posted at 7:21 AM on Friday, January 24th, 2014
(((((Chrysalis123))))) Lots and lots of hugs. 
Kajem ( member #36134) posted at 8:57 AM on Friday, January 24th, 2014
Chrysalis,
Realizing that their hatred doesn't go away was so hard for me to get. It is a scary thing to realize, just how far they will go to get that win against us.
He will do everything he can to throw you under the bus! You've been a very bad opponent my friend-you stood up to him. Why didn't you just pay all his bills (on your teacher salary) so he could just have a good time. Chrysalis, after all he's given you sooooo much and never took anything from you! 
Hon, there's a reason you kept all those emails-you know your time rebuking his claims is not over. You've got the truth on your side, let your lawyer use it. Just because he interprets things differently now, doesn't mean that's the way the rest of the normal world will interpret the decree.
Hugs, the realization that after so many years the hatred hasn't lessened still stings. The time is approaching where it won't matter anymore, your dealings with him are coming to an end.
You've got this! With grace, truth and a brilliant lawyer, you've got this!
More hugs,
K
I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - UnknownRelationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.
nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 2:05 PM on Friday, January 24th, 2014
(((((Chrysalis))))) Strength to you, honey.
You can call me NIK
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
MovingUpward ( member #14866) posted at 2:08 PM on Friday, January 24th, 2014
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