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Newest Member: SadDadOf3 (46038)

User Topic: My Mum is very ill....
movingforward777
♀ 6850
Member # 6850
Sad  Posted: 3:02 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Nine days ago I took my 85 yr old Mum to hospital by ambulance with pneumonia. She has not improved, in fact worsened. Today I had to make some tough decisions about her care and have decided to make her palliative. She can't swallow, can't speak, has had a small heart attack since going into hospital because of how hard her body is working to breathe, and they are questioning whether she has had a stroke.
Even though I am a nurse it has been a tough decision. I don't want her to suffer and linger on fighting to breathe, but it is hard to let her go too. My family are on board with the plan of care, and are all praying it will not be a long and drawn out death for her.
Please pray for her comfort, for wisdom for the staff working with her, and for myself and my family. Loving someone means not letting them suffer....I wish it just felt better doing this for someone I love so much......


You can't reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday's junk.......Louise Smith

Posts: 4846 | Registered: Apr 2005 | From: Ontario
metamorphisis
♀ 12041
Member # 12041
Default  Posted: 3:18 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am so very sorry. You are making loving and courageous decisions for your mom, and I am so sorry they hurt like they do. Sending you love and strength.



“We don't see things as they are; we see them as we are.”... Anais Nin

Posts: 45404 | Registered: Sep 2006
simplydevastated
♀ 25001
Member # 25001
Default  Posted: 3:25 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so sorry to hear this. This sounds exactly like what happened with my grandmother. She went in with pneumonia. I don't think she was in the hospital too long before she passed.

Sending you strength and (((Hugs))) to get through this difficult time.


Me - BS, 39 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS10, DD7
Married, for now... (4+ D-Day - listed in profile.)

Posts: 5854 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: In the darkest depths of hell!
GabyBaby
♀ 26928
Member # 26928
Default  Posted: 3:29 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((( movingforward777 )))


Me - 42
SorryInSac (STBX WH#2) - 47. DDay 7/12/14
Married 4, together 7yrs total
Status - Done

DD(21), DS(18, PDD-NOS)
6 Furkids - 4 dogs, 2 cats

WXH (serial cheater, 12+ OW) - Legally married 18yrs

I edit often for clarity/typos.


Posts: 6741 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: California
Pentup
♀ 20563
Member # 20563
Default  Posted: 3:33 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ditto Meta. (((Moving forward))))


Me- BS
Him- FWS (I hope- F)

Posts: 6718 | Registered: Aug 2008 | From: Not Oz
Jrazz
♀ 31349
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 4:10 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((movingforward777)))


"Welcome the rawness of vulnerability as an opportunity to open." - Pema Chodron

Me: BW 35
Crazz: WH 33
Daughter: 4.5 Going on 16


Posts: 18698 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
jo2love
♀ 31528
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 4:54 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((moving & family)))

Posts: 36807 | Registered: Mar 2011
jrc1963
♀ 26531
Member # 26531
Default  Posted: 5:00 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Movingforward)))


Me: BSO - 46
Him: FWSO - 69
DS - 13
D-Day - 12-11-09,
R - he finally came home
Your life is an Occasion. Rise to it. - Mr. Magorium, "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium"

Posts: 24750 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Florida
sisoon
♂ 31240
Member # 31240
Default  Posted: 5:49 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((movingforward)))


fBH (me) - 70 (22 in my head), fWW (plainsong) - 65+, Married 45+, together since 1965
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
I share my own experience because it's the only experience I know, not because I'm a good model.

Posts: 10758 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: Chicago area
unfound
♀ 12802
Member # 12802
Default  Posted: 6:27 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Keeping you and your family close in my heart


ka-mai
*******************
From time to time, I do consider that I might be mad. Like any self-respecting lunatic, however, I am always quick to dismiss any doubts about my sanity. DK

Posts: 14877 | Registered: Nov 2006 | From: mercury's underboob
nowiknow23
♀ 33226
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 7:18 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((((movingforward))))) Sending you comfort, honey.


You can call me NIK

"Keep your face always toward the sunshine - and shadows will fall behind you."
-Walt Whitman


Posts: 26516 | Registered: Aug 2011
purplejacket4
♀ 34262
Member # 34262
Default  Posted: 8:04 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You've made a difficult but loving decision.

Hugs.


Me: BS 45
Her: fWS 48 (same sex partner)
Together: 18 years now (both MDs)
OW: meh so what 40s PhD
DD1: 10/30/11EA; DD2: 11/10/11 Had ONS; TT until 12/26/11; broke NC 6/12; NC again 7/12; R-ish

Posts: 2361 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: Great Southwest
HUM1021
♂ 6222
Member # 6222
Default  Posted: 8:09 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

prayers up +


Me: BS 34
Her: WS 33
M 5 years
dday with 1st OM 4/30/04 EA/PA
dday with 2nd OM 12/11/04 EA/PA
on the reconciliation rollercoaster

Posts: 739 | Registered: Jan 2005 | From: Colorado
million pieces
♀ 27539
Member # 27539
Default  Posted: 8:15 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I work in an ICU and see these scenarios play out all the time. Not everyone is able to make these tough decisions, your mom is very lucky to have you. Hugs.


Me - 42
2 kids, 9 and 12
D-Day 2/5/10, separated 3 wks later
Divorced 11/15/11!!!!

Posts: 1281 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: MD
JanaGreen
♀ 29341
Member # 29341
Default  Posted: 8:20 PM, January 22nd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so sorry. ((Hugs))


We're both in our 30s. One awesome 5-year-old daughter. Baby Green 2.0 expected June 2015!!!!!!!!!

Posts: 6972 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: Somewhere in the South
tushnurse
♀ 21101
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 7:48 AM, January 23rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((moving)))

A tough decision, but a selfless one. Having seen families not be able to make this choice, know that you are doing something very selfless.

May she find comfort and peace.

(((and strength)))


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8898 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
movingforward777
♀ 6850
Member # 6850
Default  Posted: 11:06 AM, January 23rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you all for your love and support....


You can't reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday's junk.......Louise Smith

Posts: 4846 | Registered: Apr 2005 | From: Ontario
Deeply Scared
♀ 2
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 11:09 AM, January 23rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Movingforward))))

I'm so very sorry


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 199199 | Registered: May 2002
Topic Posts: 18

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