Anyway, I'm actually not jealous but inside, it does piss me off because I'm instilling the work ethic attitude in him to save up to buy, and start small and work towards big...instilling good morals and ethics in him. And then BAM, outta nowhere, he gets a *blank*. I can't believe she'd stoop to this (oh wait, ya I can!!). Unreal.
So I'm wondering, is there anyone else out there who experiences this and/or how to handle it? Do I just take the high road and let it be (her disney mom'ming)?
But I won't understand how that's enough to these people. I have a gut instinct urge to actually parent my children, teach them morals and how life works, like you, so buying them things would never be enough for me. I don't comprehend wanting so little influence on my kids lives..
So she's kind of like a Disney mom, if you include feeling sick on the scary rides as part of the experience.
I just love that shit, as you can imagine. Then she asks me to "work on some discipline with them" when they're here.
The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous
"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have." ~ Bob Marley
Then he would send the kids to mom's, and say that she would not take any sh*t from them. His words.
I mean it was crazy. It took him 3 hours to put his 3 year old to bed. Don't miss that scene.
Advice.... first of all you are doing the right thing. Kids don't need to grow up thinking that life is about "being good" in exchange for cash and prizes. Other than that? I really don't know. Don't be surprised if relationships for an overindulgent parent are short-lived and finances are a hot mess. Be prepared to be extra stable.
Don't introduce anyone to your kids for at least 6 months maybe a year. Because too many people may drift out of their life.
Gosh I'm rambling. I hope this helped a bit.
In my case it isn't just him showing affection. It's malignant affection. He uses gifts & outings as a way to prove he's better than me, that he's fun. Worse, he brainwashes the kids about it, pointing out how I don't do this or that with them, that I don't take them here or there, that I don't get them those things. They tell me how he trash talks me. It would be one thing if he just got them these things as a genuine gesture of love. It's something else entirely when he uses these things as weapons of war.
I have my kids in therapy. That's the only way. When they bring home these fantastic gifts or after a fun-filled outing, I try hard to be enthusiastic for them. I'm not always successful, but I try. Occasionally they'll ask me if I'm mad because they got _____. Usually I'm not mad, so I tell them no, I'm not mad, and ask why they asked. Then they'll let me know that Daddy told them I'd be upset. I have to assure them that I'm happy for them, blah blah blah.
He's such a bastard.