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Don't know what I feel anymore

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heartbroken7110 posted 1/24/2014 15:27 PM

So I have been in R with my WH for a few years now. He has been working hard to get my trust back for the past 5 years. We have both been in counseling on our own & MC. It's been a rough few yrs BUT finally he has slowlyyyyyy won my trust back. Everything has been going great BUT I now feel like all this work could b for noth

heartbroken7110 posted 1/24/2014 15:31 PM

My post was cut off! Sorry!!

So I feel like all this was for nothing. I now feel like I'm not toys lily in love anymore. At least not the way we should be. YES I do love my husband BUT in the way one should love, feel, & look at there spouse...not so much:( all this work to end up feeling like this!? So confused...anybody else climb over this mountain, get to the top, & feel like ummmm now what!? :( sad day to b writing this day...

somanyyears posted 1/24/2014 15:37 PM


..has he done something to set you off??

..have you come to realize that your feelings have changed??'ve been in R for ??5?? years.. has your H just been coasting for the last while.. maybe you're on that dreaded plain of Lethal Flatness..

..are you still communicating with him honestly?


[This message edited by somanyyears at 3:38 PM, January 24th (Friday)]

heartbroken7110 posted 1/24/2014 15:47 PM

Somanyyears thanks for your reply.

I guess I hate to admit but my feelings have changed:(

NO I have not communicated my feelings to my spouse yet...kinda hit me like a ton of bricks today. Was driving & boom....

somanyyears posted 1/24/2014 19:08 PM

..are there still issues unresolved from his A?

..are you detaching slowly.. becoming less and less connected?

..are you just in a funk and maybe in a few days, you'll feel better?

..have you had a vacation from each other in the last year??

..are you and he connecting on 'any' level?

..has your M just turned into 'blah'.. no zip, no life, no more highs?

..can you do something to turn that around?

..would you want to?

sorry you're feeling so bummed out.. many of us here, will second guess our choice to stay, especially those in a long established M.

..sleep on it and see what the morning brings...

..take care of you, first and foremost!!


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