My reconciliation attempt ended VERY recently with my exWBF; in some ways I've had the time since my first discovery to begin processing a change in how I see the man I was with, but he was still selling me a story about our future and his efforts in IC, NC with OW etc. that I was buying until the curtain fell. My own IC is big on 'feeling the feelings', but I am a bit numb most of the time and in shock, and really WANT to learn to think differently and protect myself from yearning for a lost cause. All of that takes time--I know that. Slowly the anger and hurt will get processed and fade.
But I've also recently (post-breakup) seen someone I used to have a crush on, who has interest in me also apparently, and our friends are talking about setting us up. I would really like to see what could develop there--it's not just a rebound, in that I know my crush existed before and now I'm rediscovering it, instead of creating it out of nothing as a distraction. As long as I'm mindful and honest and try to take it slow, can people start opening up to new possibilities before they've fully healed the old wounds? It's hard because of course I'd love to just skip ahead and get past what happened, when that's simply not realistic. And I do want the time to honor what I lost and mourn and repair myself. But I want to be open to new happiness and exciting romantic opportunities too!
Any who've BTDT and can shed some light?